angelduck
Active Member
- Joined
- Mar 19, 2004
- Messages
- 1,878
- Gender
- Female
- HSC
- 2004
yeah, i know, not really related to ancient, but there are some references i assure you! even so, i figured id post it here, it is highly amusin. *waits for backlash from mods*
Mafia: plz note the references to the Duck! Im finally takin over the world, now to plan "left shoe seizure" - operation black cloud
Phrases found in NSW Year 12 HSC English responses
1. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
2. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature prime English beef.
3. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
4. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
5. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
6. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.
7. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
8. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
9. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and "Sex in the City" comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
10. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
11. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot oil.
12. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
13. Even in his last years, Grandad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.
14. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
15. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
16. "Oh, Jason, take me!" she panted, her breasts heaving like a Uni student on $1-a-beer night.
17. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
18. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
19. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
20. She was as easy as the TV Guide crossword
21. She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
22. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.
23. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
Some responses in other HSC exams
1. Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics. They lived in the Sarah dessert and the climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere
2. Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the red sea, where they made unleavened bread which is bread made without any ingredients. Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the Ten Commandments. He died before he ever reached Canada
3. Solomon had 3 hundred wives and 7 hundred porcupines
4. The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we wouldn’t have history. The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female moth
5. Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but by another man of the same name
6. Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock. After his death his career suffered a dramatic decline
7. Eventually the Romans conquered the Greeks. History call people Romans because they never stayed in one place for long
8. Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul. The idea of march murdered him because they thought he was going to be made king. Dying he gasped out: 'Tee hee, Brutus's'
9. Joan of Arc was burnt to a steak and was canonized by Bernard Shaw. Finally Magna Carter provided that no man should be hanged twice for one offence
10. Another story was William tell who shot an arrow through an apple while standing on his sons head
11. Queen Elizabeth was the 'virgin queen'. As a queen she was a great success, when she exposed herself before her troops they all shouted 'hurrah'
12. It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented the removable type and the bible. Another important invention was the circulation of blood. Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes and started smoking. Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 100 foot clipper
13. The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday. He never made much money and is only famous because of his plays. He wrote tragedies, comedies and hysterectomies, all in Islamic pentameter. Romeo and Juliet are examples of a heroic copulet. Romeo's last wish was to be laid by Juliet
14. Writing in the same time as Shakespeare was Miguel Cervantes. He wrote Donkey Hote. The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote paradise lost. Then his wife died and he wrote paradise regained
15. John Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practiced on an old spinster which he kept in his attic. Bach dided from 1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the world and so was Handel. Handel was half German, and Half Italian and Half English. He was very large
16. Beethoven wrote music through he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died from this
17. The 19th C was a time of great many thoughts and inventions. People stopped reproducing by hand and started reproducing by machine. The invention of the steam boat caused a network of rivers to spring up.
18. The First World War, cause by assignation of the arch-duck by an anahist, ushered in a new error in the anals of human history
Mafia: plz note the references to the Duck! Im finally takin over the world, now to plan "left shoe seizure" - operation black cloud
Phrases found in NSW Year 12 HSC English responses
1. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.
2. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli and he was room-temperature prime English beef.
3. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
4. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.
5. He was as tall as a six-foot-three-inch tree.
6. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM.
7. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
8. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
9. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and "Sex in the City" comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.
10. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.
11. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot oil.
12. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
13. Even in his last years, Grandad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.
14. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.
15. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
16. "Oh, Jason, take me!" she panted, her breasts heaving like a Uni student on $1-a-beer night.
17. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame. Maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.
18. The ballerina rose gracefully en pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.
19. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.
20. She was as easy as the TV Guide crossword
21. She walked into my office like a centipede with 98 missing legs.
22. It hurt the way your tongue hurts after you accidentally staple it to the wall.
23. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.
Some responses in other HSC exams
1. Ancient Egypt was inhabited by mummies and they all wrote in hydraulics. They lived in the Sarah dessert and the climate of the Sarah is such that the inhabitants have to live elsewhere
2. Moses led the Hebrew slaves to the red sea, where they made unleavened bread which is bread made without any ingredients. Moses went up on Mount Cyanide to get the Ten Commandments. He died before he ever reached Canada
3. Solomon had 3 hundred wives and 7 hundred porcupines
4. The Greeks were a highly sculptured people, and without them we wouldn’t have history. The Greeks also had myths. A myth is a female moth
5. Actually, Homer was not written by Homer but by another man of the same name
6. Socrates was a famous Greek teacher who went around giving people advice. They killed him. Socrates died from an overdose of wedlock. After his death his career suffered a dramatic decline
7. Eventually the Romans conquered the Greeks. History call people Romans because they never stayed in one place for long
8. Julius Caesar extinguished himself on the battlefields of Gaul. The idea of march murdered him because they thought he was going to be made king. Dying he gasped out: 'Tee hee, Brutus's'
9. Joan of Arc was burnt to a steak and was canonized by Bernard Shaw. Finally Magna Carter provided that no man should be hanged twice for one offence
10. Another story was William tell who shot an arrow through an apple while standing on his sons head
11. Queen Elizabeth was the 'virgin queen'. As a queen she was a great success, when she exposed herself before her troops they all shouted 'hurrah'
12. It was an age of great inventions and discoveries. Gutenberg invented the removable type and the bible. Another important invention was the circulation of blood. Sir Walter Raleigh is a historical figure because he invented cigarettes and started smoking. Sir Francis Drake circumcised the world with a 100 foot clipper
13. The greatest writer of the Renaissance was William Shakespeare. He was born in the year 1564, supposedly on his birthday. He never made much money and is only famous because of his plays. He wrote tragedies, comedies and hysterectomies, all in Islamic pentameter. Romeo and Juliet are examples of a heroic copulet. Romeo's last wish was to be laid by Juliet
14. Writing in the same time as Shakespeare was Miguel Cervantes. He wrote Donkey Hote. The next great author was John Milton. Milton wrote paradise lost. Then his wife died and he wrote paradise regained
15. John Bach wrote a great many musical compositions and had a large number of children. In between he practiced on an old spinster which he kept in his attic. Bach dided from 1750 to the present. Bach was the most famous composer in the world and so was Handel. Handel was half German, and Half Italian and Half English. He was very large
16. Beethoven wrote music through he was deaf. He was so deaf he wrote loud music. He took long walks in the forest even when everyone was calling for him. Beethoven expired in 1827 and later died from this
17. The 19th C was a time of great many thoughts and inventions. People stopped reproducing by hand and started reproducing by machine. The invention of the steam boat caused a network of rivers to spring up.
18. The First World War, cause by assignation of the arch-duck by an anahist, ushered in a new error in the anals of human history
