How does the technique of syntax created by punctuation help to take the respondant on a journey with the persona?
For example:
"He thought he would return to the house and lie down, and next summer, perhaps, when he had another year's growth in him - then he would go through the hole."
"But even after he had made the decision, or thought he had, he found himself sitting up on the rock and looking down into the water, and he knew that now, this moment - this was the moment he would try."
For example:
"He thought he would return to the house and lie down, and next summer, perhaps, when he had another year's growth in him - then he would go through the hole."
"But even after he had made the decision, or thought he had, he found himself sitting up on the rock and looking down into the water, and he knew that now, this moment - this was the moment he would try."