ignition said:
My gf's parents are asian and i feel quite uncomfortable meeting her parents because a) her parents dont know that my gf has a bf and b) they dont exactly sound lyk they would forgive us lol.
wat should i do
Doesn't really sound like an ideal situation to me. It seems a bit wrong that your girlfriend's parents don't know about her having a boyfriend. I guess this is a result of her feeling unable to tell them, but it still seems a bit sad that they're not close enough to discuss things like this. Still, I guess everyone handles things like that differently. I guess another factor to consider might be how long you've been going out, if it hasn't been very long at all then I guess this isn't too much of an issue at this stage, but if it's an elongated relationship and they still haven't been filled in, then I'd be a little concerned.
If they don't know about you, it'd probably be advisable for you to meet them after they found out. Finding out that she has a boyfriend will (possibly) be a bit of a surprise, and meeting him at the same time probably isn't useful.
That said, if you're serious about being accepted by them, I'd always advocate being upfront and meeting them as soon as is possible (and realistic). If I were a parent, I'd be far more inclined to trust my child's partner if they were willing to meet me and talk to me about things. If I got the impression that they were avoiding me, I'd doubt their motives, and would think of it as being a bit disrespectful. Not to say that you have to meet them after the first date or anything, just relatively early on. Maybe that's a bit old fashioned, I don't know, but that's how I see it.
And in response to them sounding like they wouldn't be forgiving, I suspect that may be a defence mechanism employed by parents to delay their children from entering into relationships for as long as possible. I've found that in my experience, once they're filled in that things are happening, they generally get used to it, although I guess this too may vary depending on cultural influences and such. From what I've seen, most parents (One would hope) only want their children to be safe and happy, and providing that they are satisfied that these conditions are met, there aren't too many reasons for them to interfere.
Whoops, post looks a bit long but I don't feel like trimming. Hope it makes sense and is useful, and my apologies if I sound like I'm judging, definitely not my intention.
