How to get over someone (1 Viewer)

[Anononthehunt]

As an update to any future readers, this has been heavily edited to be less personal 18/03/26.
I was best friends with this girl (she's 4+ years older than I am), and we fell out a few months ago (both our faults), but I keep thinking about her.

I want to.. not forget her, exactly, she's given far too much to me to warrant that, but I want to feel normal about her. Any ideas? Or is that something that only comes with time?

 

[Kat.crazi]

I was best friends with this girl (she's 4+ years older than I am, so 19-22 over the time of our friendship). I idolised her (for good reason, she made me confident + encouraged me to become the writer I am today), I was probably(??) in love with her but the age gap + distance (she lived in WA for majority of the time I knew her so we texted nearly all of the time) + lack of experience on my part + her discomfort with how attached I was about her + a million other things didn't make it possible or even in the realm of possibility in my mind.

We fell out a few months ago (my fault, I wanted more than she could give me and I didn't like the obsessed person I was turning into around her), but I keep thinking about her and dreaming about her and seeing her favourite things everywhere and.. god, so much. There were bushfires in her area announced on the radio a few months ago and I literally rushed to my phone as soon as I could to google if her town was alright.

I want to.. not forget her, exactly, she's given far too much to me to warrant that, but I want to feel normal about her. Any ideas? Or is that something that only comes with time?

This is gonna sound super cliche and ik everyone says it but I honestly think that you're right about it taking time. You definitely wont wake up tomorrow and feel completely fine again, but there are ways to alleviate it a bit. Allow yourself to process the experience, good and bad parts, and even if you feel sad thinking about it that's part of it too. Eventually, it won't hurt so bad when you think about it (I hope!). Good luck, and I'm no expert so take everything I say with a grain of salt : )

 

[Anononthehunt]

This is gonna sound super cliche and ik everyone says it but I honestly think that you're right about it taking time. You definitely wont wake up tomorrow and feel completely fine again, but there are ways to alleviate it a bit. Allow yourself to process the experience, good and bad parts, and even if you feel sad thinking about it that's part of it too. Eventually, it won't hurt so bad when you think about it (I hope!). Good luck, and I'm no expert so take everything I say with a grain of salt : )

Yeah, I figured it'd be something like that. Wish there was a way to just.. magically get it to stop :[ but there isn't. I just gotta keep going. Thank you for the advice even so, I really appreciate.

 

[MoeyNeeds90+]

I was best friends with this girl (she's 4+ years older than I am, so 19-22 over the time of our friendship). I idolised her (for good reason, she made me confident + encouraged me to become the writer I am today), I was probably(??) in love with her but the age gap + distance (she lived in WA for majority of the time I knew her so we texted nearly all of the time) + lack of experience on my part + her discomfort with how attached I was about her + a million other things didn't make it possible or even in the realm of possibility in my mind.

We fell out a few months ago (my fault, I wanted more than she could give me and I didn't like the obsessed person I was turning into around her), but I keep thinking about her and dreaming about her and seeing her favourite things everywhere and.. god, so much. There were bushfires in her area announced on the radio a few months ago and I literally rushed to my phone as soon as I could to google if her town was alright.

I want to.. not forget her, exactly, she's given far too much to me to warrant that, but I want to feel normal about her. Any ideas? Or is that something that only comes with time?

As above says, and its honestly pure truth, its time. I know what your saying cos i still get that even, 7 odd months after a relationship ended but each and every day a piece of me just builds back to what i once was. Im sure in a few months, as will be the case with yourself, she'll just be that 'special bit of the past' nothing more. if it helps to know with the second bit u said, on the day of the month we first met, i fall asleep thinking about her, over half a year following our break up. not easy but it'll end trust me.

work out and build a pump it really helps : )

 

[Kat.crazi]

Yeah, I figured it'd be something like that. Wish there was a way to just.. magically get it to stop :[ but there isn't. I just gotta keep going. Thank you for the advice even so, I really appreciate.

yeah I know : ( would be nice if things could stop sometimes, however the world moves on and we gotta find a way to move with it (that was cringe blame the English notes I’m doing rn). You will get through this!

 

[Legendary16]

I was best friends with this girl (she's 4+ years older than I am, so 19-22 over the time of our friendship). I idolised her (for good reason, she made me confident + encouraged me to become the writer I am today), I was probably(??) in love with her but the age gap + distance (she lived in WA for majority of the time I knew her so we texted nearly all of the time) + lack of experience on my part + her discomfort with how attached I was about her + a million other things didn't make it possible or even in the realm of possibility in my mind.

We fell out a few months ago (my fault, I wanted more than she could give me and I didn't like the obsessed person I was turning into around her), but I keep thinking about her and dreaming about her and seeing her favourite things everywhere and.. god, so much. There were bushfires in her area announced on the radio a few months ago and I literally rushed to my phone as soon as I could to google if her town was alright.

I want to.. not forget her, exactly, she's given far too much to me to warrant that, but I want to feel normal about her. Any ideas? Or is that something that only comes with time?

It was hard at first, to not feel anything at all. I still had feelings but knowing what she did, I also felt that raging hate. It turned out to be a slow and painful path to get to a point where you forget most of the interactions you had, and thus the feelings that you had earlier (coupled with being blocked months after the fallout).

 

[Anononthehunt]

As above says, and its honestly pure truth, its time. I know what your saying cos i still get that even, 7 odd months after a relationship ended but each and every day a piece of me just builds back to what i once was. Im sure in a few months, as will be the case with yourself, she'll just be that 'special bit of the past' nothing more. if it helps to know with the second bit u said, on the day of the month we first met, i fall asleep thinking about her, over half a year following our break up. not easy but it'll end trust me.

work out and build a pump it really helps : )

Thanks man, weirdly enough I have been thinking about taking up running haha, so who knows, I just might! Appreciate it a lot, thank you

 

[Kat.crazi]

<33 thanks Kat, appreciate it a ton T^T

Ofc : )