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You got a substantial amount of recounting the events in your essay, but the focus is its RELEVANCE to Sally Morgan's inner journey. I suggest you can do without the early parts of Sally's childhood, but keep the bit about her "Indian" identity and the Jill's view on her identity to contrast it...

hmm...I'd say to turn away from materialism as a topic, 'cause the focus is journey and materialism isn't that much of a use. If you're focusing on physical journey, perhaps then the need for Chiro to adapt to a new environment is a new point. For Inner journeys, there's a lot to be said...

Case Studies~ The exact case study that covers the entire BusS course for Qantas - that's why it's so popular. It's brief so we can mould it in the extended response. Expensive...can't help you on that one...maybe second hand ones?? I'm probably going big on Qantas but a few others...

it doesn't really matter what order you put the texts in as long as it's coherent. Your way is text focused, and groups the related texts with the prescribed, so that's helping to group the main ideas together. It's best to relate the supplementary texts to the prescribed as the focus is...

it's cool, just adding stuff...hehe :P

" i dont get things like the generalisations like... - potassium ions, sodium ions, calcium ions and aluminium ions are never reduced." The potassium, sodium, calcium and aluminium ions are high on the standard potentials table - or high in reactivity. On the table, potassium needs - 2.xx V...