Bit of a pickle (1 Viewer)

[sungsam]

hey

well theres this chick ive working with for the past like 5 years, and for about 3 weeks now she has been smsing me every single day. after like the first week i got the hunch that she was interested and since other workers have been saying 'u should ask [name] out' and '[name] is very interested in you' etc.

so far the messages have only been like 'how was ur day' 'what are u doing tomorrow' 'hows your night out' and stuff like that.

whats the pickle you say... well i really like this girl but at the moment im not looking to have a relationship and i dont think she is really my type. I dont want to just go out with her coz i know she will. I'd hate to stuff things up with her or get stuck in a relationship i know isnt right but at the same time not want to get out of it because hurt i'd cause her and potentially ruin any friendship we have.

I'd really love to be close friends with her but im not quite sure how to say this without making it awkward and plus i really really suck when it comes to directly discussing relationship issues ie. I completely avoid having to do so.

my current plan of attack is to go with the flow and just continue exchanging smses and well basically not to make any advances. and when the day comes she makes an advance then spill... i know its not the best way but its all i know - ignorance is bliss.

any advice/views would be much appreciated, thanks

 

[polymorph]

ask her if she wants to go for coffee/food/ect. See how she reacts to that, and work your way on from there.
1: Ask her for a casual lunch
2: ???
3: profit!
whoops, didn't read correctly.
1: Ask her for her credit card details
2: ???
3: profit!

 

[glitterfairy]

sungsam - sounds like you're on the right track. I'd be selective about how often you respond to her sms messages though... the way girls overanalyse, if you're always responding within 2 seconds then that means you're keen :/

Don't feel the need to "spill" if she one day does make an advance. A simple "I'm flattered but sorry I don't feel the same way, let's be friends" will be fine Don't need to go into the whole "I don't really want to enter a relationship right now rahrah" because that tends to open the door for more problems than you bargained for

 

[sungsam]

sungsam - sounds like you're on the right track. I'd be selective about how often you respond to her sms messages though... the way girls overanalyse, if you're always responding within 2 seconds then that means you're keen :/

Don't feel the need to "spill" if she one day does make an advance. A simple "I'm flattered but sorry I don't feel the same way, let's be friends" will be fine Don't need to go into the whole "I don't really want to enter a relationship right now rahrah" because that tends to open the door for more problems than you bargained for

cool thanks for that, I am always a prompt smser but yeah i do usually reply pretty much straight away and have little sms convos, i think in the first 2 weeks she was messaging me i counted around 40 messages from her. So i guess i will try to hold off on the replies

 

[sja]

FUCK HER BRAINS SILLY!

and then take her out for dinner. and then disappear for a week, then fuck her again. then come back and make a post, i'll tell you what to do from there.

 

[Redgoddess]

okay i'd do what you're doing in that you're not making any moves. i wouldnt bring up the issue if she doesnt. it definitely sounds to me like she's interested, and she's probably gotten the impression that you reciprocate cos of your prompt sms-ing, so she's probably waiting for you to make a move. if you kinda slow down on the sms-ing she might pick up that you don't wanna go there. and if she does ask i'd probably just say, as someone already mentioned 'thanks but i'm not interested' cos saying you dont want a long term rlnship, regardless of whether it's true or not, is a cop out.

 

[sja]

ignore redgoddess

FUCK HER!

 

[INXS]

Ditto to the person above. Just bang her.

 

[Lions_Fist]

I always get a kick out of seeing someone attempting to stem a flow of trollism by flaming them...
It's like putting out a fire with the bottle of alcohol you're drinking...

 

[wallaby2]

Yeah I am with sja. Just plant the goods and run.

 

[tlodg]

It's been 5 years since you've been working together, why is she suddenly interested in you?

 

[SamTan*06*]

FUCK HER BRAINS SILLY!

and then take her out for dinner. and then disappear for a week, then fuck her again. then come back and make a post, i'll tell you what to do from there.

R u like this with all women??? Coz i think that UR the one with the issues, not sungsam......

Yes a much agree with glitterfairy...dont seem to keen coz girls over analyse. Just follow this advice and keep things simple

 

[Dr_Doom]

Fee Fie Foe Fum. I smell the blood of someone who can't recognise sarcasm.

OMG!!!! are you EVER EVER EVER not on Bos? lol, your a BoS addict. A huge one at that. Do you get your highs by these forums. oh dear. Where is your social life? *shakes head* lol. but seriously, you are never offline.

 

[Lions_Fist]

OMG!!!! are you EVER EVER EVER not on Bos? lol, your a BoS addict. A huge one at that. Do you get your highs by these forums. oh dear. Where is your social life? *shakes head* lol. but seriously, you are never offline.

Interesting. To my computer screen it shows him being offline now... OTOH do you ever post anything constructive?

 

[Dr_Doom]

Interesting. To my computer screen it shows him being offline now... OTOH do you ever post anything constructive?

Because I hide my online status.

OTOH no I don't