I completely undesrtand what you are going through...my mum suffers from it and it is horrible at home and there are so many things going through your mind, conflicting messages of anger and compassion, wanting them to be the 'parent' sometimes too...Im not one (not that there is anything wrong with it) who ever saw myself going to a councellor. But the best thing I would say is to go to the councellor what have you got to loose - that sounds simplistic but its true - its completely confidential and a smart thing to do, take initiative of your life - it helped so much for her to listen to me etc. So yeah when i saw this post i 'needed to say something'
...but yeah go to someone who knows what theyre talking about and can give you advice...it might be hard but seriously it helped me so much and I hope things improve for you, your family and your mum!