Ive got a band 6 essay from a guy who came first in english at my school last year but i cannot understand it (1 Viewer)

graceluvsA's

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I know english is tommorow but someone can u pls help. HOW DID HE GET A BAND 6 WHEN I DONT UNDERSTAND ANYTHING HE SAYS. It's merchant of venice btw and PM me if you have time to read it.
 

graceluvsA's

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I don't do merchant of venice but I had similar experiences with extension english. The exemplar essays we were given sounded like gibberish and were too wordy and complicated to be good (even our teacher agreed). I prefer writing in a slightly more straightforward style, hopefully the markers appreciate that. But I swear those kinds of essays, people just write the most generic shit ever and make it sound overcomplicated and smart and get B6/E4.
This is exactly what this guy did. His thesis was 'the inconsistencies of religious thought and the compelling notion of circumstance,' then he started going on about Michel Foulcalt and got a band 6 like wtaf.
 

Masaken

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This is exactly what this guy did. His thesis was 'the inconsistencies of religious thought and the compelling notion of circumstance,' then he started going on about Michel Foulcalt and got a band 6 like wtaf.
bro for merchant of venice my thesis is literally just barebones like 'collective prejudice bad and shows paradoxes of humanity' 💀

the above thesis is literally 'collective is inconsistent in how they treat individuals' he could've just said that 💀
 

Masaken

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have yall since those tiktoks of like "read a band 6 mod b response from a 2022 state ranker!" and its straight up vomit from a thesaurus
i cant comprehend half those words, surely not bruh
with every single english text is a decent idea that can be said in not a convoluted and purple prosey flowy way
they're just trying to pretend they memorised the whole thesaurus alongside their essay to make them sound better but it's really just a pedantic mess 💀
 

carrotsss

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have yall since those tiktoks of like "read a band 6 mod b response from a 2022 state ranker!" and its straight up vomit from a thesaurus
i cant comprehend half those words, surely not bruh
when I write my essays I just keep a thesaurus open and try to use every single fancy word instead of repeating the same words and then I always get commended for my “vocabulary” 😭
 

nsw..wollongong

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with every single english text is a decent idea that can be said in not a convoluted and purple prosey flowy way
they're just trying to pretend they memorised the whole thesaurus alongside their essay to make them sound better but it's really just a pedantic mess 💀
how tf do they get state rank tho i feel stupid asf saying phrases like "this emphasises this..." 💀 compared to their "the instantiation of this phenomenon embodies a reflection of..."
 

Masaken

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how tf do they get state rank tho i feel stupid asf saying phrases like "this emphasises this..." 💀 compared to their "the instantiation of this phenomenon embodies a reflection of..."
bro it's way too much for me like in my honest opinion i used to be intimidated by this and then i beat the people in my school who used purpley prosey thesaurus vomit in their essays with the most simplistic 'this shows that', 'emphasises' 'depicts' so we allg 💀
 

graceluvsA's

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the above thesis is literally 'collective is inconsistent in how they treat individuals' he could've just said that 💀
My one in the trial was verisimilitude and risk and reward (and other bs on desire) and i got 16/20 because my idea was 'sound' according to my teacher. She is WAY too philosphical and wants us to come up with the most enlightening poetic ideas ever when theres people out here doing the most obvious and logical thesis' and getting state ranks. Idrc what my teacher says anymore im just gonna respond to the question tommorow and not go into the meaning of life or the ontological quest of humanity.
 

Masaken

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My one in the trial was verisimilitude and risk and reward (and other bs on desire) and i got 16/20 because my idea was 'sound' according to my teacher. She is WAY too philosphical and wants us to come up with the most enlightening poetic ideas ever when theres people out here doing the most obvious and logical thesis' and getting state ranks. Idrc what my teacher says anymore im just gonna respond to the question tommorow and not go into the meaning of life or the ontological quest of humanity.
idk why they want us to go super philosophical seeing as we share the same questions as standard english like ik no sane english standard cohort would pick the shakespearean play but still

my trial q was on faithfulness and i just wrote that a big part of the human experience is that individuals lose faith in their collective societies and thus try to rebel against them 💀 like with essays it's not that deep it just needs to be an idea that answers the q 💀
 

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