nice guys (2 Viewers)

[Bobness]

Are you raggin on the Justin? go get a life. Leave music to people who know not when a person gots da skillz. Like the Just.



Are you sure? Perhaps you just aren't looking hard enough. This isn't reaching, I derived these ideas not from some crack pot talking about turning water in to wine but from mainstream people and cultural examples. Are you denying the concept of layers? Have you never seen an onion?

Four minutes.

I've seen an opinion and that's why i'm asking you this.

Are you a nice guy in denial? And if you're not then do explain why you had to change your old 'nice' (you do realise nice doesn't always mean good and moral? it is derived from some Old English terminology which means 'appropriate' and 'fitting' i.e your actions do not incite anger or disapproval from others, you simply live to please others and console yourself as a "knight in shining armour" martyr whenever a girl rejects you for this essentially boring personality) personality for a jerkiness one? Again i may be wrong but it seriously seems like you were pussywhipped at least before.

4mins? pfft, great i can time my posts too

 

[55078]

Girls just want to be treated as your equals. It's fairly simple. We would like you to be "nice", in that we want respect (ie. don't say we're fat slags and try to treat us like doormats). However, we also don't want you to make us feel like stupid pets who can't do things for ourselves; so being OVERLY "nice" and "helpful" can be annoying.

 

[Oddy Nocki]

I've seen an opinion and that's why i'm asking you this.

Are you a nice guy in denial? And if you're not then do explain why you had to change your old 'nice' (you do realise nice doesn't always mean good and moral? it is derived from some Old English terminology which means 'appropriate' and 'fitting' i.e your actions do not incite anger or disapproval from others, you simply live to please others and console yourself as a "knight in shining armour" martyr whenever a girl rejects you for this essentially boring personality) personality for a jerkiness one? Again i may be wrong but it seriously seems like you were pussywhipped at least before.

hmmm...

The most obvious thing to do here is to avoid the question with a random post. This is how most people react. You are not retarded and I couldn't not be bothered so I'll front up, because 1) I don't care. 2) I live by example. 3) What the fuck else have I got to do.

I never really lived to please others, I just didn't care enough to make a fuss. It was more a case of gentleman bore through laziness. This never seemed to be a problem, I put this down to the people I assoicated with. i.e Relaxed. Then during one realationship, I came to the realiastion that it wasn't two people existing on an equal plain but that she had become to take advantage of my relaxed attitude, I while I don't mind doing things DO NOT like to manipulated. (This also explains some of the distain I have for large companies) And in essences this is what it was. So I walked away.

This is the only event in which I could even consider to be "pussy whipped". But make no mistake my friend I was always a smartass. I just got sick of retards and social norms, so now I just do whatever I want cause I can.

 

[Bobness]

@ Zoe idealistic much? And equal i think doesn't really work cause of the feminists bahahaha. you want the guy to ask you out, propose to you, pay for your dinner and balance breadwinner role with domestic duties while you're at it. but i digress

@ Oddy_nicki .. that'll do for now. you seem to be over-the-top in your defence of your personal ideology. and yes even though it may be a great thing to be passionate in something, it probably didn't contribute much to the nice guy vs jerk phenomena.

if women SAY they want to be understood .. i'm sure there can be some reasonable answers to this

llama was meant to post something on the topic

 

[davin]

well, i think there is a trouble, that Zoe's thing starts to hint toward, which is that, from the male perspective, its tough to know, offhand, what behaviour pattern to follow, since girls don't have just one way they want to be treated, convienient as that would be. I think each one has a different point that is the proper balance between doing things for them, and respecting their own independence. Just, to make things more difficult.

 

[luscious-llama]

Okay Llama's going to post again On topic.
Sorry about that.


Okay, the first two guys I had long term relationships with had an element of bastardry and if I had given my entire heart, would have shattered it - though one more so than the other due to various issues.
I thought they were based on friendship but really, they just weren't and it was my own naiveity that failed to see through this.
So yeah, you have to experience a few dickheads in life to really appreciate the lovely.

Currently the one guy i'm with now was probably in the same position as poor lad the article at the beginning of this thread. He was someone I didn't neglect or anything but failed to see that he did have feelings for me, for ages - instead going for guys who weren't exactly savoury.

Though i'm glad now that we've both come to realisation that we do in fact really love one another - and its based on friendship, rather than just "oh I like you" or some crap like that.

I think I told you a longer version of this already Bobster.

 

[Bobness]

I think I told you a longer version of this already Bobster.

yeah maybe. but this way i get to point out something lovely :uhhuh:

So yeah, you have to experience a few dickheads in life to really appreciate the lovely.

a-ha! right there. hold it right there folks.

nice guys finish last. alas the horrible truth is discovered
to the guy in that rant and well every other guy there is in a similar situation; hate to break it to you but you'll have to wait in the queues to have the jerk's seconds

BAHAHAHHA actually its not really this generalised but it makes it easier to understand all this

 

[bshoc]

If you're a nice guy don't worry - you'll get a beautiful and lovely girl - when you're 30 - and after she's finished banging 50 not so nice guys and she wants to "settle down."

 

[Bobness]

sounds better than being a downright jerk who gets all the girls up until they're 25 before they realise no girl wants to stay with them for long term.

by the way, this doesn't apply to obnoxious people like me who actually have a heart .. deep down

pussywhipped guys make me cringe and give me the urge to deck them so as to snap them out of reality though

 

[transcendent]

Yeah, and people don't like people like you and would snap you if they had the chance.

 

[Bobness]

i think i went a bit too far.

but yes ok if you say so trans-sexual

and btw i was blatantly exaggerating my position before. internets

 

[SipSip]

Nice guys tends to finish last mainly because it's true that girls like jerks until they've been hurt enough...

But on the other hand,some nice guys turn into jerks when they're in a relationship...then they know the drift of things and becomes those "jerks" that girls like to be with...so yeah...

 

[davin]

"If women like jerks as much as everyone says, my dating history should be a lot more extensive"

 

[Bobness]

I don't get it. how can you say that "as long as girls like it, there shouldn't be a problem"

that just sounded way to S&M for my liking ... you some pwhipped guy who likes the whipping

 

[Baiku]

To be honest I think "nice guys" just don't understand what being adolescent and young adults mean.

Why the hell would any fun, good-looking girl want to go out with a guy aged between 15 and 25 who is boring and nice?
They don't!
Girls 15-25 like a bit of a challenge, they like a guy they can try to "fix up", they like a guy who is good-looking, they like a guy who's mean to them sometimes but makes up for it later...

Guys that may seem to be bastards to you aren't necessarily. People think I am a bastard because I make rude comments, but it's all in jest. At heart I have no intention of hurting anyone's feelings and am actually a very considerate person.

Nice guys - you can't expect to get girls at this age without standing out SOMEHOW. There are more guys that want to have sex than girls that know what's good about sex and will admit to wanting it, so if you don't stand out from the next guy, you're not going to get a girlfriend.

 

[sparkl3z]

pft...depends on the type of girl, some girls are not mature yet, while some girls are...why would a nice guy be boring? because he will respect you for who you are instead of comparing you to jennifer lopez? because he will actually care about you instead of just caring about your sex? or because he will not only respect you, but respect other people as well?
if the girl is not mature then the guy shouldn't be mature either, but for those that are serious, nice guys will always be preferred over idiots who waste their time on what they look like to impress a different girl each week.

 

[Bobness]

if the girl is not mature then the guy shouldn't be mature either, but for those that are serious, nice guys will always be preferred over idiots who waste their time on what they look like to impress a different girl each week.

stop with the naivety. i think it was established earlier that YES, girls who aren't 15-25 are going to consider the nice guys because they'd be more mature in the their late 20s and such. hence 'nice guys finish last'?

hokay whatever. and i beg to differ with your point "[jerks] who waste their time on what they look like to impress a different girl each week". i'm not a jerk but i at least understand it's the jerks who DON'T care about how they appear to others. they're the brash fellows who are strong, dominant and essentially 'untameable'. basically they know how to prioritise their lives unlike the pwhipped guys who are walked all over.

unlike the jerks who are confident in themselves, nice guys require self-validation and well go out to show off their 'niceness' in the hopes of winning the girl of their dreams. seems their hidden agenda has got to you hasn't it?

oh and jerks stereotypically might go for sex but the nice guy's no better in that they put the woman on a pedestal, objectifying you even more than the jerk. the jerk's only (i hate this generalisation .. its a load of codswallop because nice guys are also after sex but are too timid to get any) in it for the sex but wants you to also have a good time. much more compelling than a yes man no?

plus jennifer lopez is butt ugly. except the butt

 

[Baiku]

pft...depends on the type of girl, some girls are not mature yet, while some girls are...why would a nice guy be boring? because he will respect you for who you are instead of comparing you to jennifer lopez? because he will actually care about you instead of just caring about your sex? or because he will not only respect you, but respect other people as well?
if the girl is not mature then the guy shouldn't be mature either, but for those that are serious, nice guys will always be preferred over idiots who waste their time on what they look like to impress a different girl each week.

Nice guys are boring because they act all emo and intraverted and need constant reminders that they're good enough for whoever they're seeing.

Guys that you think are jerks aren't always. Guys that you think are stupid aren't always.

In my mind there are times where you can have fun and mess around, saying whatever you want, there are times when you need to be sensitive to a girls feelings and there are times you need to focus on other things.

When you go out to a party, you are not going to pickup girls by being the guy that wipes them up off the floor when they're drunk. You're going to pickup girls by being the guy that buys those drinks for them, jumps in the pool naked with them, sings karaoke with them - etc.
Sitting in the corner will get you nowhere...

I'm 19 - I want to have fun, I want to be with a girl who wants to have fun. In a few years when I'm working full-time and etc. I might try to be the "truly nice guy" - but while I have my youth, I'm going to do my best to be a fun guy who is up for anything and deep down, I (and everyone who knows me well) know that I'm not a jerk, or an asshole.

What I'm trying to say is - sometimes you see a girl and a guy and you label the guy a jerk because he swore at you or something. He may not be a jerk, he may not treat her badly. Girls often complain about that sort of stuff to their "nice-guy" friends, but won't tell them about the good stuff.
You guys may be misinterpreting the situation, that's what I'm trying to say.

Just go out and meet some girls...

 

[sunjet]

that's getting annoying.

 

[Baiku]

You don't have to "get it".

I can't be pussywhipped if I've never gotten close to a girl. End of story.

But you're like 19