Show don't tell- help!!!!! (1 Viewer)

[muramasa]

Hey everyone,
I keep on getting "Show, don't tell" when dealing with creative writing but what do they really mean?
How can I improve this?
I only ever write the action in my stories and barely any description(I'm an action-loving person- don't like to be stopped with description LOL). Unfortunately, that means terrible marks in creative stories, despite often coming up with creative plots.

Does anyone have any advice on how I can improve?

 

[strawberrye]

http://community.boredofstudies.org...719/guide-creative-writing-examples-mark.html -have a read through this guide-it has some pretty comprehensive information that can help to answer your question

I think an important tip I can give you is to carefully consider every single sentence you put into your creative-make sure they contribute to enhancing your creative in some way. Strive to write base on your own personal experiences and consider and resolve the structure of your creative, the plot, character development, key thematic concerns about belonging and setting. If you plan ahead before you write, it will assist you to write a better creative. Lastly, remember to do plenty of practice-practice and feedback makes perfect

 

[Smile12345]

Hey everyone,
I keep on getting "Show, don't tell" when dealing with creative writing but what do they really mean?
How can I improve this?
I only ever write the action in my stories and barely any description(I'm an action-loving person- don't like to be stopped with description LOL). Unfortunately, that means terrible marks in creative stories, despite often coming up with creative plots.

Does anyone have any advice on how I can improve?

'Strawberrye''s post is great...

And the link does have this but, "Show not tell" - is like instead of saying "He was angry" (tell), show how he was angry - did he yell? What were his actions to Show he was angry??

Good luck.

 

[InsoulvencyReaper]

Show them he's angry by describing facial expression, body language and actions.

 

[rumbleroar]

It depends...could you give an example of your creative writing? The best way to "show" is always reveal any details about your characters, place or plot that is very specific so your audience has a better grasp of imagery and stuff Annie Proulx is a writer who does is marvellously well, although her style is a bit hard to get into, her imagery is sensational haha so there's an author for inspiration.

 

[obliviousninja]

who wants a sample of my short story?

 

[Smile12345]

who wants a sample of my short story?

me, please...

 

[hayabusaboston]

Goku's muscles tightened, and he clenched his fists till his knuckles turned white. The vascularity on his arms became much more prominent as he raised his hands together in unison. He was shaking from exhaustion.

"YOU WON'T GET AWAY WITH THIS FRIEZAAA!!!!"

Rays of light began to ignite, folding over one another into a sphere of hot energy between his palms.

"Kaaaaa...." The light rays shimmered in the air.

"Meeee......haaaaaa" The sphere began to glow.

"Me HAAAAAA!!!!" The energy wave ripped through the air causing a sonic boom. It raced towards the tiny entity of Frieza with graceful intensity, immeasurably powerful.

*Insert biological sequence of events when hot plasma interacts with cells in Frieza's body*

lol








There's some showing not telling.

If you wanna read a sample of my novel/short story lemme know

subtly sci fi crime empire wars, between chinese, russians etc.

 

[turnerloos]

who wants a sample of my short story?

Awww yisss pls.

 

[turnerloos]

Goku's muscles tightened, and he clenched his fists till his knuckles turned white. The vascularity on his arms became much more prominent as he raised his hands together in unison. He was shaking from exhaustion.

"YOU WON'T GET AWAY WITH THIS FRIEZAAA!!!!"

Rays of light began to ignite, folding over one another into a sphere of hot energy between his palms.

"Kaaaaa...." The light rays shimmered in the air.

"Meeee......haaaaaa" The sphere began to glow.

"Me HAAAAAA!!!!" The energy wave ripped through the air causing a sonic boom. It raced towards the tiny entity of Frieza with graceful intensity, immeasurably powerful.

*Insert biological sequence of events when hot plasma interacts with cells in Frieza's body*

lol








There's some showing not telling.

If you wanna read a sample of my novel lemme know

I'd say its pretty interesting, most friends think so too. It's subtly sci fi crime empire wars, between chinese, russians etc.

Man, if i didnt know dbz, i wouldve sounded kamehameha like this (Kar-me-har-me-har) lol

 

[Squar3root]

instead of saying "he felt sad" say "the tear rolled down his face as he tried to reminise about ..."

 

[hayabusaboston]

A tear trinkled mournfully down his cheek, as his mind was swarmed by reminiscence.

FTFY

 

[Squar3root]

FTFY

i didn't write that but that sounds even more better. ill take it


i also learnt this then when you're writing; don't say "he was very tired" instead write "he was exhausted"

try to avoid using the word "very, more" and some other ones on the list i cant remember

it shows the marker "i know smart words and i am sophisticated" and it stops you from repeating yourself

 

[obliviousninja]

instead of saying "he felt sad" say "the tear rolled down his face as he tried to reminise about ..."

trickled

 

[Squar3root]

trickled

???

 

[turnerloos]

???

he meant instead of saying "rolled down" u say "trickled"

 

[Squar3root]

he meant instead of saying "rolled down" u say "trickled"

that sounds even more better

OP, we have a story in the marking.

Ill start and everyone add on a sentence:

As the memories flooded in a tear trickled against his face as he reminisced about that night.