Simpsons Quotes thread (1 Viewer)

[spence]

I second this, relax!

Anyway here's my favourite one!

Seymour Skinner: Well, that was wonderful. A good time was had by all. I'm pooped.Superintendent Chalmers: Yes, I should be— Good lord, what is happening in there?Seymour Skinner: Aurora Borealis?Superintendent Chalmers: Aurora Borealis? At this time of year? At this time of day? In this part of the country? Localized entirely within your kitchen?Seymour Skinner: Yes.Superintendent Chalmers: May I see it?Seymour Skinner: No

Seymour, the house is on fire!
No mother, it's just the northern lights

And from the same episode:
Lou: You know, I went to the McDonald’s in Shelbyville on Friday night –
Wiggum: The McWhat?
Lou: Uh, the McDonald’s. I, I never heard of it either, but they have over 2,000 locations in this state alone.
Eddie: Must’ve sprung up overnight.
Lou: You know, the funniest thing though; it’s the little differences.
Wiggum: Example.
Lou: Well, at McDonald’s you can buy a Krusty Burger with cheese, right? But they don’t call it a Krusty Burger with cheese.
Wiggum: Get out! Well, what do they call it?
Lou: A Quarter Pounder with cheese.
Wiggum: Quarter Pounder with cheese? Well, I can picture the cheese, but, uh, do they have Krusty partially gelatinated non-dairy gum-based beverages?
Lou: Mm-hm. They call ‘em, “shakes.”
Eddie: Huh, shakes. You don’t know what you’re gettin’.

 

[VanDAmme]

Homer's brain - "EatThePuddingEatThePuddingEatThePuddingEatThePuddingEatThePudding
EatThePuddingEatThePuddingEatThePuddingEatThePuddingEatThePudding
EatThePuddingEatThePuddingEatThePuddingEatThePuddingEatThePudding"

 

[LingstyleZ]

doh.

>=)

 

[binary star]

ralph: "this is my sandbox, I'm not allowed to go in the deep end".

 

[Brontecat]

Homer "you just cost me $200, 000"
Bart "I thought it was 50"
Homer "i was going to bet it on the dogs"

haha love that one

 

[LordPc]

Homer: I didnt lie! I was just writing fiction with my mouth.

 

[dux&src]

Homer: I didnt lie! I was just writing fiction with my mouth.

lmao

in which episode was that... i need u to jog my memory

 

[LordPc]

lmao

in which episode was that... i need u to jog my memory

its when marge writes a book and in it the main character (temperance) is in love with flanders.

 

[Silver Persian]

Mr Burns: Oooh, so Mother Nature needs a favor?! Well maybe she should have thought of that when she was besetting us with droughts and floods and poison monkeys! Nature started the fight for survival, and now she wants to quit because she's losing. Well I say, hard cheese."

I totally get Smithers' attraction

 

[love.is.around]

Top 10 Simpsons Quotes

By Simran Khurana, About.com
Top 10 Simpsons Quotes: Popular Quotes Among Fans of the Simpsons show
Food: Homer Simpson Quotes
Hey, I asked for ketchup! I'm eatin' salad here!

Life views: Homer Simpson Quotes
Life is just one crushing defeat after another.

Religion: Homer Simpson Quotes
Save me, Jeebus. Jeebus, where are you? I want Jeebus.

Stupidity: Homer Simpson Quotes
I don't have to be careful. I got a gun.

Stupidity: Homer Simpson Quotes
... and I'm not impressed easily... Wow! A blue car!!

Stupidity: Homer Simpson Quotes
You put the beer in the coconut and throw the can away.

Stupidity: Homer Simpson Quotes
Wow! A baby and a free burger! Could this be the best day of my life?

Television: Homer Simpson Quotes
Ah, TV respects me. It laughs with me... not at me!

Wise Cracks: Homer Simpson Quotes
D'oh! The bee bit my bottom. Now my bottom's big.

 

[runtlocks]

LOCAL MAN LOSES PANTS, LIFE

 

[ehtefaz.hedayet]

Halloween episode - The Shining

homer: "Here's Michael!!!"

grandpa : "Hello there, my name is grandpa."

ROFL

 

[Silver Persian]

Marge: I'm going into the dining room to have a conversation. If you want to join me, fine. (leaves room) Hello Marge, how's the family? I don't want to talk about it. Mind your own business!
Homer: Keep it down in there!

 

[lpodnano]

Bart: I can't believe Homer's ass actually prevented the release of toxic...
Marge: BART!

Well the quote was vaguely what i remember.

 

[Crestwood's_G]

Because I feel we really need one


Host: Now, folks, I don't wanna alarm ya, but scientists say forty
percent of America's pictures... are hanging crooked.
[the audience gasp in shock]
Yep, it's true. And I hear you asking: "Well, who's gonna
straighten out all these artistic abominations?" Your friends?
A neighbor? Those fat cats at Washington? [chuckles] Good
luck. Hey, you know, maybe no one'll notice! Maybe the problem
with ju-u-u-st fix itself.
Marge: Now you're the one who's being naive.
Host: Okay. Fair enough. But you sound like you're ready to become
your own boss in the exciting world of frame-nudging! Yes, for
a minimal franchise fee, you'll receive a pair of straightening
gloves, a cannister of wall lubricant and a booklet of the most
commonly asked questions you will hear, including: "Who are you?"
and "What are you doing here?"

That last line cracks me up

haha yeah same..."who are you?" and "what are u doing here?" HAHA....

Homer: Argh!
Kent Brockman: My producer has told me to not ask you any more questions.
Homer: Woohoo!

Rod and Todd: Each leap takes us closer to god. *Bump heads*
Todd: What have we done to anger you?
Rod: You did it!

^Can't remember which one says what.

Maude: Todd...you have small girly arms...stick your arms in and see what it is.

 

[Crestwood's_G]

Mr. Burns: Quick Smithers. Bring the mind erasing device!

Smithers: You mean the revolver, sir?

Mr. Burns: Precisely.

Gentlemen, you've both worked very hard. And in a way, you're both winners. But in another, more accurate way, Barney is the winner.

Here are your messages: ‘You have thirty minutes to move your car.’ ‘You have ten minutes.’ ‘Your car has been impounded.’ ‘Your car has been crushed into a cube.’ ‘You have thirty minutes to move your cube.’

I may occasionally kill out of anger; or to illustrate a point, but I'm no Grim Reaper!

Oh my God! Someone's trying to kill me! Oh wait, it's for Bart.

Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true.

Religion! Religion in a public school! Religion has no place in a public school, like facts have no place in organised religion!

 

[Crestwood's_G]

Homer: Well, what did everybody think?
Ned: Homer, I can honestly say that's the best episode of "Impy & Chimpy" i've ever seen!
Carl: Yeah, you should be very proud, Homer, you uh... got a beautiful home here.

That's right I did the Ishy!

 

[Crestwood's_G]

Ding, dong. The sound of the Liberty Bell. Ding. Freedom. Dong. Opportunity. Ding. Excellent schools. Dong. Quality hospitals.

HAHAHA love that...the guys NY accent..."we the purple what the hell was that?" "but before you burn the flag, better burn that car and TV, because none of it would exist without 7 red stripes, 6 white stripes and a hella lot of stars...thank you!"

 

[emilyo]

ralph : Lepraucarns tell me to burn things

 

[i.am.amanda]

Were sending our love down the well...(Krusty)Down that well!!