I don't know if this helps but perhaps consider the literary technique 'asyndeton', which is basically the omission of conjunctions in parts of a sentence. In the quote, there is "and" missing from "dauntless, voiceless" so asyndeton can probably be used.
This grammatical compactness can maybe grab the reader's attention and emphasise upon the mood/atmosphere that the author is trying to convey. It can also possibly speed up the rhythm which can create a more tense atmosphere perhaps.
However, this is just a suggestion from my perspective.