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Urgent speech help (1 Viewer)

jadg

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May 26, 2018
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2018
In urgent need for feedback on my speech for Transitions in society in relation to two related texts! Any help would be greatly appreciated :)

Should be less than 4 minutes
Question:
The process of transition may lead to growth and a range of consequences on individuals and society. Explore this statement in relation to two related texts.


Elizabeth Lesser once said “How ironic that the difficult times we fear might ruin us are the very ones that can break us open and help us blossom into who we are meant to be”. The process of transition has the transformative power to evoke growth and shape an individual and their relationship with society. No matter how much we resist it, transitions are an inevitable part of the human experience that have consequences on individuals and society. The consequences of change are explored in texts such as the poem ‘Neighbours’ by Tim Winton and picture book ‘The tunnel’ by Anthony Brown.

Throughout the poem ‘Neighbours’ the meaningful process of transition is explored, as Tim Winton uncovers its nature and the transformative consequences that follow change within an individual and society. In the poem, the young couple move into a street full of european immigrants, where they are forced to overcome cultural barriers in order to assimilate into the community. Wintons use of a smilie “the newly weds felt like sojourners on a foreign land” indicates the couple feel unwelcome in their new environment as they are compared to outsiders. However as the poem progresses, the couples flourishing backyard represents the strengthening relationship between them and their neighbours. As the couple grows to lose sight of their ignorance towards the immigrants, this impacts society as the neighbors become more approachable, offering assistance with the garden. The alliteration of ‘b’ “the big woman with black eyes and the butchers arm gave her a bagful of garlic cloves to plant” emphasises the supportive nature of society as a consequence of the couples transition. Winton demonstrates the individual growth of the couple as they develop a sense of compassion and acceptance towards their neighbours as they begin to refer to them by their names rather than their nationalities.

Similarly to ‘Neighbours’, Anthony Brown’s picture book ‘the tunnel’ explores individual’s and society’s growth and the consequences resulting from personal response to transitions. In the beginning of the book, Brown uses high modality “in every way they were different”, to establish the brother and sisters poor relationship which has potential for growth. When the mother forces the pair to bond, it is evident neither of them are willing to cease arguing, until they find a tunnel. Brown uses this tunnel to physically symbolise the transition in the siblings relationship as he uses adjectives to compliment the images on the page to allow to audience to visualise the “dark, damp, slimy and scary” tunnel. Rose is hesitant to crawl through, which connotes human nature to resist the process of transition, as she is ignorant to what may be on the other side. However when Rose passes through the tunnel to find her brother and sees him turned to stone, she grew her understanding of the importance of family. The transition in the relationship between Rose and Jack is reflected through the transforming images from dark to light and Jack gains movement and they begin to hug. Demonstrating the individual growth experienced by the pair leading to the consequence of a strengthened relationship, Brown uses a simple sentence “Rose smiled at Jack, and Jack smiled back”. This puts emphasis on their newfound ability to see past their differences, which is supported by the image of them facing each other. Transitions in relationships evidently impact society, as seen through the mother's delight yet confusion at the pairs ability to accept each other as she asks “is everything alright?”, conveying her newfound appreciation of her children's relationship.

Ultimately, the process of transition is valuable to individuals and society as it inevitably results in growth. This is seen through the young couple in “the Neighbours” by Tim Winton, where the pairs self cultural acceptance grows and in “The tunnel” by Anthony Brown where the siblings grow to overcome their differences and display their love for eachother. Throughout these texts, transition evidently leads to a range of consequences including strengthened relationships between individuals and the society around them. Although the main characters resist change, it is evident that “the difficult times we fear might ruin us are the very ones that open us up and help us blossom into who we are meant to be”.
 

MrSir

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in urgent need for feedback on my speech for transitions in society in relation to two related texts! Any help would be greatly appreciated :)

should be less than 4 minutes
question:
The process of transition may lead to growth and a range of consequences on individuals and society. Explore this statement in relation to two related texts.


Elizabeth lesser once said “how ironic that the difficult times we fear might ruin us are the very ones that can break us open and help us blossom into who we are meant to be”. The process of transition has the transformative power to evoke growth and shape an individual and their relationship with society. No matter how much we resist it, transitions are an inevitable part of the human experience that have consequences on individuals and society. The consequences of change are explored in texts such as the poem ‘neighbours’ by tim winton and picture book ‘the tunnel’ by anthony brown.

Throughout the poem ‘neighbours’ the meaningful process of transition is explored, as tim winton uncovers its nature and the transformative consequences that follow change within an individual and society. In the poem, the young couple move into a street full of european immigrants, where they are forced to overcome cultural barriers in order to assimilate into the community. Wintons use of a smilie “the newly weds felt like sojourners on a foreign land” indicates the couple feel unwelcome in their new environment as they are compared to outsiders. However as the poem progresses, the couples flourishing backyard represents the strengthening relationship between them and their neighbours. As the couple grows to lose sight of their ignorance towards the immigrants, this impacts society as the neighbors become more approachable, offering assistance with the garden. The alliteration of ‘b’ “the big woman with black eyes and the butchers arm gave her a bagful of garlic cloves to plant” emphasises the supportive nature of society as a consequence of the couples transition. Winton demonstrates the individual growth of the couple as they develop a sense of compassion and acceptance towards their neighbours as they begin to refer to them by their names rather than their nationalities.

Similarly to ‘neighbours’, anthony brown’s picture book ‘the tunnel’ explores individual’s and society’s growth and the consequences resulting from personal response to transitions. In the beginning of the book, brown uses high modality “in every way they were different”, to establish the brother and sisters poor relationship which has potential for growth. When the mother forces the pair to bond, it is evident neither of them are willing to cease arguing, until they find a tunnel. Brown uses this tunnel to physically symbolise the transition in the siblings relationship as he uses adjectives to compliment the images on the page to allow to audience to visualise the “dark, damp, slimy and scary” tunnel. Rose is hesitant to crawl through, which connotes human nature to resist the process of transition, as she is ignorant to what may be on the other side. However when rose passes through the tunnel to find her brother and sees him turned to stone, she grew her understanding of the importance of family. The transition in the relationship between rose and jack is reflected through the transforming images from dark to light and jack gains movement and they begin to hug. Demonstrating the individual growth experienced by the pair leading to the consequence of a strengthened relationship, brown uses a simple sentence “rose smiled at jack, and jack smiled back”. This puts emphasis on their newfound ability to see past their differences, which is supported by the image of them facing each other. Transitions in relationships evidently impact society, as seen through the mother's delight yet confusion at the pairs ability to accept each other as she asks “is everything alright?”, conveying her newfound appreciation of her children's relationship.

Ultimately, the process of transition is valuable to individuals and society as it inevitably results in growth. This is seen through the young couple in “the neighbours” by tim winton, where the pairs self cultural acceptance grows and in “the tunnel” by anthony brown where the siblings grow to overcome their differences and display their love for eachother. Throughout these texts, transition evidently leads to a range of consequences including strengthened relationships between individuals and the society around them. Although the main characters resist change, it is evident that “the difficult times we fear might ruin us are the very ones that open us up and help us blossom into who we are meant to be”.

i have sent you a private message as i have had experience at marking hsc papers as well

happy to help you if you would like some assistance
 

MrSir

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i will give you my total feedback as per the message I have sent to your private message box . Well done with your engaging of the audience and your sophisticated use of quotes . As teachers we look for description primarily and keeping quotes to a minimum is important as it means responders hear what you think rather than someone else's opinion . Anyway Ive sent you a message so I can get your feedback to you and I've almost finished marking your speech . Anyway there are a lot of positives here in this speech . See your PM for more information
 

MrSir

Member
Joined
Dec 25, 2016
Messages
168
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in urgent need for feedback on my speech for transitions in society in relation to two related texts! Any help would be greatly appreciated :)

should be less than 4 minutes
question:
The process of transition may lead to growth and a range of consequences on individuals and society. Explore this statement in relation to two related texts.


Elizabeth lesser once said “how ironic that the difficult times we fear might ruin us are the very ones that can break us open and help us blossom into who we are meant to be”. The process of transition has the transformative power to evoke growth and shape an individual and their relationship with society. No matter how much we resist it, transitions are an inevitable part of the human experience that have consequences on individuals and society. The consequences of change are explored in texts such as the poem ‘neighbours’ by tim winton and picture book ‘the tunnel’ by anthony brown.

Throughout the poem ‘neighbours’ the meaningful process of transition is explored, as tim winton uncovers its nature and the transformative consequences that follow change within an individual and society. In the poem, the young couple move into a street full of european immigrants, where they are forced to overcome cultural barriers in order to assimilate into the community. Wintons use of a smilie “the newly weds felt like sojourners on a foreign land” indicates the couple feel unwelcome in their new environment as they are compared to outsiders. However as the poem progresses, the couples flourishing backyard represents the strengthening relationship between them and their neighbours. As the couple grows to lose sight of their ignorance towards the immigrants, this impacts society as the neighbors become more approachable, offering assistance with the garden. The alliteration of ‘b’ “the big woman with black eyes and the butchers arm gave her a bagful of garlic cloves to plant” emphasises the supportive nature of society as a consequence of the couples transition. Winton demonstrates the individual growth of the couple as they develop a sense of compassion and acceptance towards their neighbours as they begin to refer to them by their names rather than their nationalities.

Similarly to ‘neighbours’, anthony brown’s picture book ‘the tunnel’ explores individual’s and society’s growth and the consequences resulting from personal response to transitions. In the beginning of the book, brown uses high modality “in every way they were different”, to establish the brother and sisters poor relationship which has potential for growth. When the mother forces the pair to bond, it is evident neither of them are willing to cease arguing, until they find a tunnel. Brown uses this tunnel to physically symbolise the transition in the siblings relationship as he uses adjectives to compliment the images on the page to allow to audience to visualise the “dark, damp, slimy and scary” tunnel. Rose is hesitant to crawl through, which connotes human nature to resist the process of transition, as she is ignorant to what may be on the other side. However when rose passes through the tunnel to find her brother and sees him turned to stone, she grew her understanding of the importance of family. The transition in the relationship between rose and jack is reflected through the transforming images from dark to light and jack gains movement and they begin to hug. Demonstrating the individual growth experienced by the pair leading to the consequence of a strengthened relationship, brown uses a simple sentence “rose smiled at jack, and jack smiled back”. This puts emphasis on their newfound ability to see past their differences, which is supported by the image of them facing each other. Transitions in relationships evidently impact society, as seen through the mother's delight yet confusion at the pairs ability to accept each other as she asks “is everything alright?”, conveying her newfound appreciation of her children's relationship.

Ultimately, the process of transition is valuable to individuals and society as it inevitably results in growth. This is seen through the young couple in “the neighbours” by tim winton, where the pairs self cultural acceptance grows and in “the tunnel” by anthony brown where the siblings grow to overcome their differences and display their love for eachother. Throughout these texts, transition evidently leads to a range of consequences including strengthened relationships between individuals and the society around them. Although the main characters resist change, it is evident that “the difficult times we fear might ruin us are the very ones that open us up and help us blossom into who we are meant to be”.

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