A little flirting help plz! (1 Viewer)

borkis04

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Hey guys,

Well..first of all im a shy nice bloke who hasnt had a lot of past experiences with gfs at all..1 real one in fact that didnt last too long..

well ive taken on the approach..gettin to know this girls..shes well..one ove been looking for..not 4 a 1st bang...but like ive only really met her once at a party last weekend and was wondeirng after i take it a few steps further..how do i srart flirting with a "mate"..coz im too nervous too flirt..i often think too much abt it...

any suggestions on how to make that first flirt..or watever..

im not bad looking and neither is she..we r both nice but we r both..from what i hear..inexperienced with the opposite sex and therefore a tad uncomfortable..

i really would appreciate it if anybody could help! i thank you in advance!
 

SuGa BunI =D

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relax, take a chill pill :D

get the mentality right,
approach her as a friend/mate, not as a future girlfriend/ potential love interest
 

hipPo3

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u posted twice

anywayz, just be freindly towards her.. flirting is just practically talking, so go there and talk to her
 

Dreamerish*~

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I agree with the above.

Don't flirt if you have to force yourself, you'll just come off as unnatural as you feel.

Be friends before you take it any further - you learn to crawl before you learn to walk. Besides, if you don't even know her well, you can't claim to like her for anything but her looks.
 

Rafy

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flirting isnt about HAR HAR im a gay sleazbag but about humor n paying the other person out lol
 

AlleyCat

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i think the best way to flirt is to be honest and forward about it. if you want to go out with her, ask her out. dont just beat around the bush for months and months.
good luck.

Edit: i actually agree with rafy. ribbing and cheekiness is fun and lets them know what your on about without being too blatant about it.
 
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mcs

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Im not sure whether paying them out is the right way to go about it- to do that you need to be a shrewd judge of character or else you can very easily get burnt- saying that it is always fun though!!
 

borkis04

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Thanks guys! :D

ahh phew..yeah thanks a heap guys!

yeah been a bit stressed out 2day abt the HSC..its only just hit me :|...and all that procrastination hasnt helped either..:(

just needed a few suggestions and so ill just chat 2 her..not 2 quick but :p..

yeh sory abt posting it up twice! i thought the 1st one didnt get through..so i did it again :S..

yeh once again thansk guys..jsut needed 2 reassure myself as i was confused..and that my only ex bagged me out for it...i took it to heart...and then egged her house :D
 

ElGronko

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Beating around the bush is for perverts looking in windows.
 

Enoch

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umm...i helped a few of my mates with chix probs...with very similar 'expereinces' with chix as u...umm i guess its pretty hard to help u as like most of the time wen i help em its like individual situations...ex.. one of my mates was at our formal and i helped him with like alotta things...tho nothing happened like with the chik...he did learn allotta things and get more confidence..

umm i guess u gotta remem is

-wen tlking to her u gotta ask like open qsns..ie qsns ehere the answer isnt a yes/no/i dunnoe/short phrase...even tho uve met her once

-wen shes answering ur qsns ...listen to what shes saying cos then u can continue the tlking with stuff shes tlking bout...ex..."yeah i went to watch a movie on sat..." there...u can ask bout wot movie she watched and stuff like that

-dun ask generic or gay nerdy or lame qsns..or tlk bout that stuff...like...'hows skool" that is like soo fuking generic...u can ask "wot skool u goto" however cos thats like i dunnoe ok i guess....dont ask nerdy qsns like"do u do ne past papers"or "wot do u wanna do in uni" rofl...LOOL...nd dun ask lame qsns llike "where do u live"///

-try nd tlk to her wen ur sorta alone...cos then all the focus is between u too and its easier for her to tlk as opposed if her friend or ur mate was there

-dun try nd flirt till she kinda fells comfortable with u...

-nd also how u flirt depends on wot type of chik she is...ie. is she shy or...

-but yeah if shes comfortable and ur comfortable nd u guys r like laughing and stuff and ur sure its ok to flirt...then heres a good way to tell her ur interested...look at her eyes so that its just a bit too long..like just...bout 3 secs id say...do this like wen u guys rnt tlking...shell noe that ur interested...that would be THE best way to tell the chik ur interested...this will backfire if she isnt really into u thats why u should sorta spend a bitta time on the qsns

-if this works...err...she blushes...or woteva...ull know....then proceed on tlking to her...sorta keep asking her qsns...ull noe wen shes interested when she starts laguhing at nething...then sorta add in a few dirty stuff...every so often...thats like the flirting bit...

-oh and sorta act urself..if ur a nerd or quite person dun try and act like a jock or woteva...obviously if she kinda liikes u then she likes woteva u are..

-oh nd fix ur self nice...on the exterior..if ur at a party or going out and u noe shes gonan be there...wear some decent clothes..put on some perfume...do ur hair...woteva...just make sure ur appraoachable...ex...my mate was going to formal...and i helped him out with wot to wear...he was gonna bear a black suit, white shirt, and a grey tie....thats not the way to go to be approachable...he looked WAAY too formal...so i changed his tie to a pink tie ...and immediately he looked ok.

i guess further help would prolly be like assessing ur own individual scenario cos u havent really said nething THAT much...individuale probs require indiv help...so yeah if u did actually think that my help was helpful...i can help u more...if it isnt....well...theres something wrong in ur execution...
 

borkis04

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haha thanks a heap!

yeah well ill go with that i think..i was thinking of being well a player n acting cocky and confident...coz they seem to get all "da ladies"..but she seems..from 1st impressions that shes a really nice girl...word is going around already but :p that we both sorta sorta like each other..i havent told anybody yet coz i was willing to wait to htink abt it after my HSC...i wont b seeing her til after my HSC..should i play 'low-key' til then? n if she really likes me..then she will well..make a move..or tell me..?

i odnt mean this ofensively towards her but shes weird..like shes gorgeous.. intelligent...witty and we have the same sense of dry humour :D...and she doesnt know any guys really...so im not particularly worried atm abt other guys making moves on her..however i may hav lost my chance if i look back at her after my HSC with a guy in her hands..:(

bloody HSC
 

borkis04

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Thanks!

enoch said:
umm...i helped a few of my mates with chix probs...with very similar 'expereinces' with chix as u...umm i guess its pretty hard to help u as like most of the time wen i help em its like individual situations...ex.. one of my mates was at our formal and i helped him with like alotta things...tho nothing happened like with the chik...he did learn allotta things and get more confidence..

umm i guess u gotta remem is

-wen tlking to her u gotta ask like open qsns..ie qsns ehere the answer isnt a yes/no/i dunnoe/short phrase...even tho uve met her once

-wen shes answering ur qsns ...listen to what shes saying cos then u can continue the tlking with stuff shes tlking bout...ex..."yeah i went to watch a movie on sat..." there...u can ask bout wot movie she watched and stuff like that

-dun ask generic or gay nerdy or lame qsns..or tlk bout that stuff...like...'hows skool" that is like soo fuking generic...u can ask "wot skool u goto" however cos thats like i dunnoe ok i guess....dont ask nerdy qsns like"do u do ne past papers"or "wot do u wanna do in uni" rofl...LOOL...nd dun ask lame qsns llike "where do u live"///

-try nd tlk to her wen ur sorta alone...cos then all the focus is between u too and its easier for her to tlk as opposed if her friend or ur mate was there

-dun try nd flirt till she kinda fells comfortable with u...

-nd also how u flirt depends on wot type of chik she is...ie. is she shy or...

-but yeah if shes comfortable and ur comfortable nd u guys r like laughing and stuff and ur sure its ok to flirt...then heres a good way to tell her ur interested...look at her eyes so that its just a bit too long..like just...bout 3 secs id say...do this like wen u guys rnt tlking...shell noe that ur interested...that would be THE best way to tell the chik ur interested...this will backfire if she isnt really into u thats why u should sorta spend a bitta time on the qsns

-if this works...err...she blushes...or woteva...ull know....then proceed on tlking to her...sorta keep asking her qsns...ull noe wen shes interested when she starts laguhing at nething...then sorta add in a few dirty stuff...every so often...thats like the flirting bit...

-oh and sorta act urself..if ur a nerd or quite person dun try and act like a jock or woteva...obviously if she kinda liikes u then she likes woteva u are..

-oh nd fix ur self nice...on the exterior..if ur at a party or going out and u noe shes gonan be there...wear some decent clothes..put on some perfume...do ur hair...woteva...just make sure ur appraoachable...ex...my mate was going to formal...and i helped him out with wot to wear...he was gonna bear a black suit, white shirt, and a grey tie....thats not the way to go to be approachable...he looked WAAY too formal...so i changed his tie to a pink tie ...and immediately he looked ok.

i guess further help would prolly be like assessing ur own individual scenario cos u havent really said nething THAT much...individuale probs require indiv help...so yeah if u did actually think that my help was helpful...i can help u more...if it isnt....well...theres something wrong in ur execution...
yeh mate..thansk 4 that!..ahh i tried not 2 put 2 many personal details in there obviously :p but enough i think so u guys woulod vaguely understand my situation...:D

im very appreciative! ahh yeh well a few of my mates r annoying when they r around..in that situation..they owuld giggle or laugh or watever at me wen im trying to talk to her..but yeh im over that..ive gained confidence..and common sense with girls that suit my personality...

i dont get a UAI..(damni wish i was wrong) of 99...but im quite intelligent still..and well my ex...she was drop-dead gorgeous..but she was just soo frustrating to talk 2 coz she had the maturity age of a yr7..i felt like a pedophile :| haha (she was only 9 months younger so i actually wasnt! :p) I still go 4 looks..but personality...ie having an awesome fun time with them is so much more attractive to me now..im much less shallow for it :D

yeh shes quite shy so i htink i might take that approach..i perved at her a few times..but she didnt see me...and she perved at me quite a number of times during the night..but i unfortunately didnt catch her ;)

joking around n then flirting i think..would b the way to go :D...in 5 bloomin' weeks!

thansk guys!..dug me out of a bottomless pit of tragic teenage romance :p..i feel so pathetic asking abt this when people in this world have REAL problems :(
 

borkis04

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yeah true..i thought it was a stupid question bcoz well..so many ppl out there laugh at questions like i asked u guys...even though they know they r in the same sorta position..:p..possibly.. :p

thansk a bunch...i wish i could speed up time :D

well im not thinking of it as really..'gaining a girlfriend'..but morelike spending loving time with a special person..coz shes only ever had a good reputation for being nice and under-rated :D

thanks guys..no doubt ill get back 2 ya once i come across another problem...
 

borkis04

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oh and **hugs back**

yeh im inexcperienced coz im not one of those guys who feels pressured into 'getting a gf' for the sake of it..i have tons and tons of girl mates...but its just i cant flirt..and im too nice at times so they just 'wanna be friends' :( haha ahh but its all good coz i love my mates :D
 

mcs

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Hey Borkis4,
Good luck mate! Ive been in similar positions, and well usually for me I manage to f**k it up, but thats just me I think! As for the idea of having heaps of mates and being too nice, I know exactly how you feel mate!!! Whether nice is the word for it in my case Im not sure, but yeh I can empathise with you for sure!

Good luck next week buddy and then good luck after that. But remember mate, keep it fun and well whether it comes off or not itll all be just another experience in the wheel of life (Woah this study for HSC thing is really sending my brain skitz!)

Matt
 

biggles04

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enoch said:
umm...i helped a few of my mates with chix probs...with very similar 'expereinces' with chix as u...umm i guess its pretty hard to help u as like most of the time wen i help em its like individual situations...ex.. one of my mates was at our formal and i helped him with like alotta things...tho nothing happened like with the chik...he did learn allotta things and get more confidence..

umm i guess u gotta remem is

-wen tlking to her u gotta ask like open qsns..ie qsns ehere the answer isnt a yes/no/i dunnoe/short phrase...even tho uve met her once

-wen shes answering ur qsns ...listen to what shes saying cos then u can continue the tlking with stuff shes tlking bout...ex..."yeah i went to watch a movie on sat..." there...u can ask bout wot movie she watched and stuff like that

-dun ask generic or gay nerdy or lame qsns..or tlk bout that stuff...like...'hows skool" that is like soo fuking generic...u can ask "wot skool u goto" however cos thats like i dunnoe ok i guess....dont ask nerdy qsns like"do u do ne past papers"or "wot do u wanna do in uni" rofl...LOOL...nd dun ask lame qsns llike "where do u live"///

-try nd tlk to her wen ur sorta alone...cos then all the focus is between u too and its easier for her to tlk as opposed if her friend or ur mate was there

-dun try nd flirt till she kinda fells comfortable with u...

-nd also how u flirt depends on wot type of chik she is...ie. is she shy or...

-but yeah if shes comfortable and ur comfortable nd u guys r like laughing and stuff and ur sure its ok to flirt...then heres a good way to tell her ur interested...look at her eyes so that its just a bit too long..like just...bout 3 secs id say...do this like wen u guys rnt tlking...shell noe that ur interested...that would be THE best way to tell the chik ur interested...this will backfire if she isnt really into u thats why u should sorta spend a bitta time on the qsns

-if this works...err...she blushes...or woteva...ull know....then proceed on tlking to her...sorta keep asking her qsns...ull noe wen shes interested when she starts laguhing at nething...then sorta add in a few dirty stuff...every so often...thats like the flirting bit...

-oh and sorta act urself..if ur a nerd or quite person dun try and act like a jock or woteva...obviously if she kinda liikes u then she likes woteva u are..

-oh nd fix ur self nice...on the exterior..if ur at a party or going out and u noe shes gonan be there...wear some decent clothes..put on some perfume...do ur hair...woteva...just make sure ur appraoachable...ex...my mate was going to formal...and i helped him out with wot to wear...he was gonna bear a black suit, white shirt, and a grey tie....thats not the way to go to be approachable...he looked WAAY too formal...so i changed his tie to a pink tie ...and immediately he looked ok.

i guess further help would prolly be like assessing ur own individual scenario cos u havent really said nething THAT much...individuale probs require indiv help...so yeah if u did actually think that my help was helpful...i can help u more...if it isnt....well...theres something wrong in ur execution...
You can't tell somebody how to 'flirt'. If you like this chick, you'll flirt with her naturally.
Try hard.
 

Dreamerish*~

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biggles04 said:
You can't tell somebody how to 'flirt'. If you like this chick, you'll flirt with her naturally.
Try hard.
Yeah, if you're trying to remember 20 rules and trying to talk to her at the same time, your head will explode.

Just talk to her the way you would talk to a friend. Flirting comes naturally once you start talking. Don't force yourself to flirt before you're comfortable enough to make decent conversation. :rolleyes:
 

Enoch

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err....no some ppl need help...imma just helping him to go the rite decision...cos for some guys and its their first time...its pretty hard cos u get nervous and u dunnoe wot to do...unnoe wot???girls should always make the first move/signa..help the brother out a bit...l
 

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