Alright bitaches, help a brother out... (1 Viewer)

ElGronko

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#23 said:
Egronk, you make a move yet or you chicken out? Anyways, UGFighter, sounds great. Haha, you can be MY Chef!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank you for your words of wisdom friends who merely exist as pixel on my monitor.

UGFighter, that was brilliant, and will shortly be put into action, although is their any substitute for mayo, as i am on a high protean, high carb diet that does not allow for such quantities of fat?

Phase one has been put into action, that being the "washing car and wearing tight fitting white Tshirt, and getting myself wet to show off my manly physique" phase. Believe me, it did not go unnoticed, although no verbal communication was made as I was witnessed from out a window.

It actually, surprisingly worked. I mean, the idea is quite ridiculous, but really not unbelievable when you think about it.

The only problem is that with the water restrictions as they are, the manly effect was near lost due to:

a. the fact I had to minimise use of water through using a bucket.

and

b. Due to the physical drain of continuously refilling a bucket, i took a break half way through the "shampooing" stage of the car wash, that lasted a little too long for our summer heat, thus stained the car, and i was forced to scrub for ages to remove the marks.

Although, if this woman is the type of woman who would throw herself at the nearest guy with a body, she is really not my type of woman, but none this less, this stage is essential in order to fulfill the "recognition step" that happens in her mind.

Due to the support shown, I know feel that it is not only my duty to "acquaint" myself with the neighbors for simply my own "satisfaction", but I now have the will, and weight of the people riding on my shoulders!

I shall do it for all of you!

It will not be a victory merely for myself, but for all who supported me! Together, we are unstoppable.

I will continue posting updates if enough interest is shown.


*edit Sorry, UGFighter, scrap the request, although this may sound foolish, I just realised that in fact, i did not have to eat the steaks. I'll have mine mayo free.
 
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Serius

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UGFighter said:
You're such a fucking pussy, what's the worse that can happen?

Why don't you invite them over for a BBQ, tell them to bring the drinks and you'll supply the food. Ask them if they like chicken or steak.

If they like steak, you're so in if you don't fuck it up it's not funny.. get a nice cut from your local butcher, sirloin or scotch fillet. Bang it out so it's nice & thin... smear it in olive oil - a good kind, not generic bullshit. Sprinkle salt & pepper on both sides as well.

This is probably the hardest part... cooking the steak - ask how they like it done, if they say medium.. put in on the BBQ, as soon as the blood starts to come out the top, turn it over and cook for rougly the same amount of time - a bit less. and make sure you ONLY turn it once

If they like it more well-done, put it on and once the blood starts coming out at the top, leave it for a few mins, then turn it.. ocne again, make sure you only turn it once.

Get some turkish bread, cut it in half.. toast that on the BBQ.

A simple sauce which tastes great - 2 parts mayonaise, 1 part sweet chili sauce, 1 part mustard.. mix it all up, spread that on the toasted turkish bread, put some hot rocket on it, put the steak on it.
fuck man are you a chef or something?
thats tyhe simplest instuctions for cooking meat ive ever heard, iam soooo gonna follow that. ok ok how do u do it medium-rare? is that like cook it until it looks like blood is going to come out top soon or something?

you are the cooking master, i usually just cook until it looks cooked like i will bang some sausages on and if they look done, then they are... i try a bit to make sure but yeah thats the exstent of my bbqing skills
 

#23

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I rekon buy a pit bull, get to know it abit so it doesnt attack you, throw it over the fence and then when it starts attacking the girls you come to the rescue :) HEROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO haha
 

LuKiN

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Egronk... haven't you ever heard of chloroform?
 

jooobl

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Ok IM a girl and I used to have crushes on my neighbours. I used to perve on my old neighbours and I know whenever they were washing their cars I was always looking out my sisters bedroom window. ALSO the oldest boy neighbour used to practise karate in his backyard, corny? yes, provide for interesting viewing? yes...

What I used to do when I tried to get my neighbours attention was to go outside and play with my dog on the road with a tennis ball, and accidentally throw it into their garden when one of the hot guys was there, and ask them to please throw it back, and when I caught it with one hand I'd say thanks!!!!!!!!! that prompts the invitation of do you wanna play with us?

OR

Coincidentally let my dog off the leash when I saw them - so she would run up to them for a pat. If you have a friendly dog, I suggest you do that as chicks love animals. Then I would say OH gosh I am so sorry about my dog, don't worry she doesnt bite blah blah blah. They would start playing with her and conversation would continue....But remember I am a chick I don't know if it works both ways.... If you see the girl outside with a dog you should try and get out there "to check the mail" or something subtle and see what happens. But if shes like really really not interested like, gives u humouring laughs that you know she doesn't mean and tries to get away, you know she ain't interested!

always use animals to your advantage! its always a winner imo :)

well thats examples of my past successes, hope that helps maybe hahaha
 

Not-That-Bright

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jooobl said:
Ok IM a girl and I used to have crushes on my neighbours. I used to perve on my old neighbours and I know whenever they were washing their cars I was always looking out my sisters bedroom window. ALSO the oldest boy neighbour used to practise karate in his backyard, corny? yes, provide for interesting viewing? yes...

What I used to do when I tried to get my neighbours attention was to go outside and play with my dog on the road with a tennis ball, and accidentally throw it into their garden when one of the hot guys was there, and ask them to please throw it back, and when I caught it with one hand I'd say thanks!!!!!!!!! that prompts the invitation of do you wanna play with us?

OR

Coincidentally let my dog off the leash when I saw them - so she would run up to them for a pat. If you have a friendly dog, I suggest you do that as chicks love animals. Then I would say OH gosh I am so sorry about my dog, don't worry she doesnt bite blah blah blah. They would start playing with her and conversation would continue....But remember I am a chick I don't know if it works both ways.... If you see the girl outside with a dog you should try and get out there "to check the mail" or something subtle and see what happens. But if shes like really really not interested like, gives u humouring laughs that you know she doesn't mean and tries to get away, you know she ain't interested!

always use animals to your advantage! its always a winner imo :)

well thats examples of my past successes, hope that helps maybe hahaha
You're a girl tho, u could of just walked over and asked for sex and u would of gotten it.
 

jooobl

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true, but its funner my way. I would of rathered the innocent girl next door rep than skanky year 9'er lookin for a root. Plus I didn't want one! I was just looking for a hot friend at that stage lol :)
 

UGFighter

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Egronk said:
Thank you for your words of wisdom friends who merely exist as pixel on my monitor.

UGFighter, that was brilliant, and will shortly be put into action, although is their any substitute for mayo, as i am on a high protean, high carb diet that does not allow for such quantities of fat?

*edit Sorry, UGFighter, scrap the request, although this may sound foolish, I just realised that in fact, i did not have to eat the steaks. I'll have mine mayo free.
Fat in mayo? I've never looked at the label of mayo, but I'd imagine it'd mainly be sugar and not fat?

Surely if you're that serious about your nutrition, you allow for yourself to eat good 90% of the time, but allow for that 10% where you slip up or indulge a little.
 

Nashie

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Egronk... even if you did have the fat in that bit of mayo the *cough* outcome (if you manage to pull this ploy off) should get rid of it pretty quick!
 

malkin86

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If you're on a low-fat diet for any length of time, and you 'indulge' in a normal-sized portion of something very fatty, like proper mayo, or cream, or butter on toast, or icecream, or ... other high-fat things... it tastes really foul and sinks to the bottom of your stomach and you just wanna puke. An indulgence, it isn't. Smaller servings, like spreading a bit of mayo on bread, for example, don't taste so foul, though.

Traditional mayonnaise recipes can use 4 or 5 eggs, and oil.. hardly low fat, but then there are low-fat varieties available in the shops.

Good luck Egronk! :)
 

danieljarvis

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my neighbours are moving soon.. and god ive been hoping for your scenario!!!! we have NOTHING interesting in my neighbourhood!!!!

if it happened to me.. id change my running (shirtless of course) time to co-incide with their returning from work or watever time.. and work out in the backyard in view of their windows acting nonshallant! ( spelling? )

that will obviously get any straight girl interested cos i can definately tell your an attractive man haha.

then late at night, steal their underwear off their clothes line and randsom it back to them for dinner. total class!!!
 

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