Re: i don't know
I have suffered with depression and GAD for a while now. I was diagnosed when I was 13 (I'm now 20), but I remember having suicidal thoughts as far back as 11. While it wasn't diagnosed, I also had troubles eating and starving myself, which still continue today.
The depression ended up getting really bad in year 10 after a few environmental triggers (my dad nearly died, my pop who lived with me and was like a second father to me died, I broke up with my first serious boyfriend, was constantly teased at school, lost contact with a lot of friends, yada yada). I was constantly on suicide watch through high school.
I ended up leaving school because I couldn't cope, though this really hurt me and my family because they're academically focused and I was on an academic scholarship. I basically felt like my life was over after that and I ended up in hospital after an OD, tried to throw myself off a shopping centre building and yeah, stupid stuff like that.
After seeing many different psychiatrists and psychologists, I finally found one that I clicked with, was put on medication that agreed with me which I still take today (the first one made me worse) and slowly worked my way back into achieving things. I worked full time for a while which got me into a routine, then went back to TAFE to finish my schooling, which I did with a distinction average. I've also appeared on a national television forum about youth depression and was approached to talk on Sunrise, though I turned it down because I felt uncomfortable being one on one as opposed to being in a group of 50.
Through this experience I learned that I wanted to help others through these and other troubled times (like the people who helped me) so I ultimately want to become a clinical psychologist. People may bag me out because I chose to go to UWS for my undergrad (I originally was accepted into Mac and changed my mind in late round) but they do not know the full story behind me and why I am lucky to attend uni at all, let alone have finished my high school education.
Others believe I am too "sensitive" and will not cope dealing with other peoples issues, though I believe I can understand where people are coming from and I have grown a thicker skin and logical way of reasoning. But I am grateful as to where I am and where I am going, despite the criticism.
The main reason why I'm writing this post is to give hope to people out there who are struggling. You can get better if you work hard at it and there is life after depression. Focus your energy into developing ways to fight it instead of self harm. Good luck.
