Fights Over Uni courses (with the family) (2 Viewers)

[MortImmortelle]

...is anyone else having to deal with this?
My mother has forbidden me to do a few courses that i want to apply for :burn:
so i'm thinking i'll pretend to cave and then change them last minute...
She told me the day before the english exams...and she said she'll talk to me about it afterwards...pfft talk my ass...more like scream at me with her lil minion yesmen aka sis and bro :mad1:
(as long as she doesnt get a hold of my numbers then it should be fine )
ugh i'm still angry about it...

 

[bringbackshred]

I honestly don't know how the fuck a parent can forbid their child from doing what they want..

It must be so fucking sad that some people are such failures that they have to live through their children.

I feel for you and I hope you get the course you want.

Perhaps you should tell your parents that they should be proud that you're even going to uni. Up here, roughly 25-30% of high school graduates go to uni, and roughly 40% of the graduates get good enough marks to even go to uni. Just gently let them know that they're lucky to be in such a good position with their children.

 

[semsav2]

They only want what THEY think is the right thing for you.

If it is not what you want, you must tell them....but not until after your exams!

Let it go for now, you need to keep forcussed. I think your "keep a low profile"

plan is a good survival plan.

Good luck with it all.

p.s What do you want to do and what do your parents want you to do???

 

[bringbackshred]

They only want what THEY think is the right thing for you.

Obviously they're wrong.

 

[~shinigami~]

...is anyone else having to deal with this?
My mother has forbidden me to do a few courses that i want to apply for :burn:
so i'm thinking i'll pretend to cave and then change them last minute...
She told me the day before the english exams...and she said she'll talk to me about it afterwards...pfft talk my ass...more like scream at me with her lil minion yesmen aka sis and bro :mad1:
(as long as she doesnt get a hold of my numbers then it should be fine )
ugh i'm still angry about it...

One question, are you Asian? =p

 

[MathsIsWeird]

I nearly had one with my mum but luckily i ended it quick and knocked her out
(Jokes) ,i told her its what i wanted to do so she let me put it in even if it is preference 6. :mad1:

 

[samuel slack]

tell her. fuck her.
Then put down what you want.

 

[Graney]

Your family sounds really sick in the head. Don't let their attitude poison you.

At the end of the day, you only have to be true to yourself.

What do you want to do? What do they want you to do?

 

[ahen]

lol yeah im assuming asian as well....or some weirdo who isn't asian and loves jrock/jap/korean dramas etc ( i know this cos 90% of my mates are asian)
anyway yeah i like your plan just stay low for now, i see you like your cool subjects (englishes) and hate your shitty subjects - good work! your parents want you to do something asian/curry like medicine/engineering? urgh that would be so typical but yeah i'd say that if they absolutely REFUSE to listen to you then as a last resort put it in your preferences and tell them that you put your stuff "last" even though you put it first and then when the offers come just be like " well obviously i wasn't good enough to get into the other courses.." if you end up with a UAI of 99 this of course won't work... but meh once the offers come then that's pretty much it anyway - nothing can be done
GOOD LUCK!

 

[~untitled~]

Lol. I wanted to go to sydney, parents refuse to let me go, and said they wont support me, hence no money, but al least im still allowed to do the course i want to do thankfully, eventhough mum is desparate for me to be a teacher.

 

[chocolate_lover]

Is it your future, or your parent's future??

FFS!

I honestly don't know how the fuck a parent can forbid their child from doing what they want..

It must be so fucking sad that some people are such failures that they have to live through their children.

I feel for you and I hope you get the course you want.

Perhaps you should tell your parents that they should be proud that you're even going to uni. Up here, roughly 25-30% of high school graduates go to uni, and roughly 40% of the graduates get good enough marks to even go to uni. Just gently let them know that they're lucky to be in such a good position with their children.

Exactly!

 

[Mr-X]

tell her. fuck her.
Then put down what you want.

Best advice in this thread.

 

[pritnep]

Are they going to be doing your degree? Are they going to be working in the field your degree will get you into for the next x+ years? Are they going to be around 100% of the time to help you with uni/career that you don't like/don't want to be in?

You’re the one that is going to have to all those things. If you don't want to do they degree they want you to then stand up to them and tell them. Explain to them your reasons for doing what you want to do and why you wouldn't do some well at what they want you do to.

Your parents have to understand even if they get you into the degree they want you in (well u get into it), that won't mean you will graduate with that degree and if you do it's a pretty safe bet your marks won't be that crash hot since you seem completely against it.

Basically it's your life, your education and your career - fight for it.

And no my parents weren't/aren't like that.

 

[lala2]

Yeah, your plan sounds like a good one. Just sneak it somewhere in and then, if they question that you got a UAI high enough to be eligible for the other ones, just tell them that the other ones' UAI cutoff shot up like crazy and so you didn't make it. Best now though, to think about your exams, and good luck!

 

[pritnep]

I wouldn't be lying or trying to deceive them. Tell them straight will be better for you in the long run.

 

[samuel slack]

I wouldn't be lying or trying to deceive them. Tell them straight will be better for you in the long run.

Yep. QFT. See my earlier post for best course of action.

 

[xclusv2bhung]

ah i hate parents who do that - one of my friends has parents like that too.
they wont even let her stick what she wants to do , on her preference list.

 

[lgaica]

parents who try to live through their children are some of the saddest people on earth, like its ok for them to encourage their kids to work hard and whatever, but to force your children's destination is just fucked, i feel sorry for these people

 

[the-1-n-only-me]

yeah. tell em straight up that you wanna be what you wanna be. if they want a teacher, tell them to get your younger sis/bro to be one.

if youre the youngest, tell em tough luck and they shouldve built up a passion for teaching from a young age.

in the end, its your life, not theirs. you can either be hated by your parents for a while because you were independant, or you can hate yourself for the rest of your life for not being what you wanna be.

im not sure if that mde any sense. also in case anyone cares, i thought you were asian aswell.

 

[MortImmortelle]

I'm Asian yes...Indian to be exact.

Thanx for your advice guys...its helped me think about it a bit more...
Whenever i get into these situations with my parents i always take the 'dont bother fighting back' technique because it makes the fights not last...
I will definately get into shit if they realize i put it in afterwards but by then atleast i'd have a reason to fight for it, seeing as i got in...

But yeah maybe i can negotiate to put it in my preferences that is a good idea! lol so obvious and yet i didnt even think about it xD

samuel_slack
ur reply made me laugh...have you seen russell peters "somebody's gonna get hurt' LOL..that flashed through my mind when you said that :rofl: ...if not..look it up

I don't think my situation is as severe as i first made it seem xD
i was writing in anger..but let me explain...i underlined what i was trying to say..its a bit long and i ended up babbling so no need to read the whole thing

See the thing is, is that i WILL still be doing what my parents approve of. They really want me to be a doctor and its the last job i'd want and they accept that now. By preferences are mostly in the medical sci/biomed/biotech area because i do not mind science and i think my mother holds out a faint hope for me to chance my ways -.-' but i would rather do research or something and so they approve of that, but it is just the fact that i want to combine it with international studies which has them going psycho...

So it isnt about my parents wanting to live through me really (even though they've tried that >< but that is under control). I don't know what it is really. A conflict in my culture? Maybe my mother just feels offended?...Also i'd have to study overseas and they are very strict about me going out of the house ever >< still i need my damn freedom eventually!

So in the end of it, i'll still come out with what my parents think will be good for me. it is just the international studies which i have a interest in majoring in japanes or french that they have issues with.... -.-'

So really it's not even that big of a deal, nor am i going against my family in a major way. They just have 'issues'. But i want to do the international course because it keeps things interesting for me, it gives me oppurtinities i want to take! It's pretty much one of the major reasons i want to go to uni. [/u](i didn't and still don't know if i'm sure i want to go)[/u] its what i really want and its actually lower cut offs then the single degree so i'd have a better chance anyway.

I'm goign to have to pay for my own uni fees anyway (for a fair majority) anyway so they can't say money is really a issue either.

My mother's logic makes little sense sometimes (i mean i got into shit for listening to non-english music/tv and rock music, certain tv shows etc -.- ) and they are strict, but for the most part i think they are just smothering me to much...

Too the peeps worse of then me lol
are you going to leave it be or change your prefs last minute too?...this is about you in the long run. remember that <3

~untitled~
are you going to be changing your preferences too? and what do you want to be doing?

mathsisweird
are you going to leave it as pref six?