Guys after "innocent" girls. (1 Viewer)

[missjohns]

One of my friends has been wanting to have this kind of one night of fooling around with me. Firstly, I have had zilch experience. Not even a kiss. And he knows this. I think the only reason he wants ME is because he wants to go all Cruel Intentions style and steal my "innocence." What he doesn't know is I like him. Although this is kind of making me lose respect for him, so I don't know.

I know I can say no, and he won't do anything, so it's kind of my choice for this to go ahead. On one side, I don't want to pass up the chance, because FINALLY a guy is offering ME. And it's about time I at least kissed a guy. But on the other side I DO want some kind of relationship to spark from this, not just the one night.

I guess I'm just kind of confused with what to do. Because I want it, but I don't.

Sorry if something like this has been posted before. This can get deleted if that's the case.

 

[sthcross.dude]

your only assuming he is only after your innocence. maybe he genuinely likes you and woud like you even if you were more experienced. just like he probably doesn't know that you secretly like him. just be honest with him.

 

[vulgarfraction]

Wait... 'wanting to'? Did he ask, or hit on you? If the former, what exactly did he say? =\

 

[missjohns]

your only assuming he is only after your innocence. maybe he genuinely likes you and woud like you even if you were more experienced. just like he probably doesn't know that you secretly like him. just be honest with him.

I don't know. What I forgot to mention is he's also planning to go back to his ex sooner or later. I think he just wants things to hold him off until he can get his ex back...

Oh and he's mentioned things in the past about "innocent" being "sexy," which is why I assume that.

 

[jumb]

One of my friends has been wanting to have this kind of one night of fooling around with me. Firstly, I have had zilch experience. Not even a kiss. And he knows this. I think the only reason he wants ME is because he wants to go all Cruel Intentions style and steal my "innocence." What he doesn't know is I like him. Although this is kind of making me lose respect for him, so I don't know.

I know I can say no, and he won't do anything, so it's kind of my choice for this to go ahead. On one side, I don't want to pass up the chance, because FINALLY a guy is offering ME. And it's about time I at least kissed a guy. But on the other side I DO want some kind of relationship to spark from this, not just the one night. I'm also not impressed with the fact that he's only after my innocence...

I guess I'm just kind of confused with what to do. Because I want it, but I don't.

Sorry if something like this has been posted before. This can get deleted if that's the case.

If you like him then go for it. If you don't like what happens, then end it.

What's the problem here?

 

[missjohns]

Wait... 'wanting to'? Did he ask, or hit on you? If the former, what exactly did he say? =\

Yeah, the former, he's just been saying things like "You and me, spur of the moment, next time we see each other...you up for it?" Unless you'd classify that as hitting on me, I don't know.

So eh, it's not really "spur of the moment" 'cause he's been talking it up...

 

[missjohns]

If you like him then go for it. If you don't like what happens, then end it.

What's the problem here?

I guess what I'm saying is, I don't think he really wants a relationship out of this no matter what happens.

 

[vulgarfraction]

Okay, is the ex ready to get back with him?

I'd say he's just trying to make her jealous. It might be fun in the short term but if you think you'll end up getting screwed over by this guy, don't do it. He could just be using you. Perhaps refuse or get really offended/angry at his proposition, and then see how he reacts.

 

[jumb]

I guess what I'm saying is, I don't think he really wants a relationship out of this no matter what happens.

How will you know till you try?

 

[TaEkWoNdObArBiE]

Wow...

It sounds fairly terrible to be in that situation.

Be honest with him, and ask him how he feels about you. It is sooo much harder to do than it sounds, but it will be worth it in the end so you aren't forced into doing something that you are unsure about doing.

Keep in mind that guys lie though and will tell you things just to get what they want.

 

[missjohns]

Okay, is the ex ready to get back with him?

I'd say he's just trying to make her jealous. It might be fun in the short term but if you think you'll end up getting screwed over by this guy, don't do it. He could just be using you. Perhaps refuse or get really offended/angry at his proposition, and then see how he reacts.

I'm not sure if his ex wants him back, I don't really know the deal with her. Maybe if she did, they'd be back together by now. But I have no idea.

I never thought about the jealousy thing. That could be it, although I don't know if he's really gonna brag to her (or anyone) about us if him and me does happen. I'm not sure though.

are you sure you won't get hurt if he gets back with his ex after?

I'm pretty sure I would. So that's another reason for me to say no. It's just hard to tell what will happen.

How will you know till you try?

That's true. I guess I'm kind of secretly hoping that if I do go for it, maybe he will want to go out with me. But who knows if that would really happen...

Be honest with him, and ask him how he feels about you. It is sooo much harder to do than it sounds, but it will be worth it in the end so you aren't forced into doing something that you are unsure about doing.

Keep in mind that guys lie though and will tell you things just to get what they want.

That sounds like a good idea. I didn't think of asking him that, I might and see what he says. I don't think he would lie about it.

The title of this thread is a tad deceptive now :/ Thanks so much for all the advice, though, everyone.

 

[Riet]

Ride his cock, you'll like it.

 

[Riet]

Keep in mind that guys lie though and will tell you things just to get what they want.

Yes, and women are never ever manipulative, right?

 

[jumb]

That's true. I guess I'm kind of secretly hoping that if I do go for it, maybe he will want to go out with me. But who knows if that would really happen...

For fucks sake, you're a stupid, spineless, attention whore. If you want something to come from this, go make it happen! There's no right or wrong way to go about it, just stop whinging and talking about it, and go do something.

 

[Enteebee]

If you want a relationship then let him know that the only way he's going to get any off you is to take you out on a few dates ^________^

 

[Serius]

jeez have some class atleast make him buy you dinner first.

Basically he might be trying to use you, or he might be trying to talk it up and act confident when he actually genuinely likes you. Almost every guy talks about hooking up with their ex. Why? cause if the circumstances are right its pretty easy.

Life is full of risks, if you want to sit on the fence then you are missing out on what could end up being a decent length relationship.

If you are worried about the whole "first time" thing well i got some news.

first kiss: i dont know. i rememeber alot of it started happening at 16 when i started drinking and going to parties[yes yes late bloomer i know] but when it rains it pours and i remember hooking up with a few girls in one night on a few occasions.

first sex? yeah i remember that, but not much about it cause i was pretty smashed.i remember it was dark and it was awesome.

basically go on a date, go slow, give him a kiss or whatever and try and get his attention then hook up. If it works then great, if not then atleast you didnt waste your time and you can move on to someone better.

 

[*BIRDIE*]

hey hun, inall seriousness DONT DO IT!!!!! i've tried that whole lets just have a bit of fun and hoped that things would lead to a relationship but i only got hurt. i havent gone all the way cos im nott ready and im not saying that your not ready cos i dont know you and hence cant judge you that way but having a pash pal isnt all that great anyway... dont leave the one you love for the one you like... cool saying but it really works and maybe the guy will realise this. also he might just be trying to keep his score up, i dont know him but any guy who is just looking for a casual IS NOT worth it. do your self a favour and look after yourself before you look after anyone else... if you say no and he leaves the friendship at least you'll now why he was there in the first place. also if innocent is sexy why change??? keep your innocene while you can cos once ts gone its gone!

 

[Riet]

Why is there so much hate on casual hooking up? Holy fuck. It seems to be mostly girls too which leads me to believe that none of you are ice-queeny enough. If you don't get attached then just a bit of fun is exactly that.

 

[jumb]

Why is there so much hate on casual hooking up? Holy fuck. It seems to be mostly girls too which leads me to believe that none of you are ice-queeny enough. If you don't get attached then just a bit of fun is exactly that.

Agreed. The age of free love is coming back.

 

[Riet]

I meant on BOS specifically.