Problem with a friend??? Need advice please? (1 Viewer)

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williamliu96

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Hey guys,

My name is Will and i'm starting a new degree this year at Uni.

So I have this problem of some 'friend' of mine is surrounding.

Basically Im starting a new degree this year at UTS IT (early offer) before previously being at UWS Communications & Business for about a year. My ATAR is 68 in 2013 .

So I want to get into IT world (long story), after I graduate from uni, hence why I want to start this new degree. After telling everyone close to me (family and friends) that I'm doing UTS IT this year, one of my friend especially caught the attention.

He's did very poorly in his HSC in 2013 (mystery mark) and is did a TAFE certificate in software development or something before hand and dreams of doing IT at UTS also. He applied also for University last year but only made it into CQU University (39 ATAR cutoff - this was last year).

After telling him I got into UTS IT, I've noticed a slight change of behaviour of him in the sense that he assumes that I need assistance from him because he is more 'experienced'. What I mean is that he is making and preparing all these powerpoint slides and documents, and even homework for me to do! Also he said that when I get assignments, he also assumes that I will ask him questions and when I do, he won't give me the answer, but just give me an idea about it.

This is absolutely ridiculous! All I just said was I made it into UTS IT and he gave me this speech about 'how to succeed to IT'?? Also, he says that CQU and UWS has a much better IT/Computer department because of its delivery of content to its students? WTF?? Seriously?

What are your suggestions to approach this?

Thanks for your input.

Cheers,
Mike
 
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pokka

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Looks like he's doing that to stroke his own ego :/ Tell him that although you appreciate all that he is doing for you, you don't need his help. Say that you'll learn the stuff in the course anyway and if you need help, you can ask him anytime.
 
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nerdasdasd

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Just tell the dude that you don't need help

"I know you're a good friend but I'll tell you if I need help"
 
Chronost

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williamliu96 said:
Hey guys,

My name is Will and i'm starting a new degree this year at Uni.

So I have this problem of some 'friend' of mine is surrounding.

Basically Im starting a new degree this year at UTS IT (early offer) before previously being at UWS Business for about a year. My ATAR is 68 in 2013 .

So I want to get into IT world (long story), after I graduate from uni, hence why I want to start this new degree. After telling everyone close to me (family and friends) that I'm doing UTS IT this year, one of my friend especially caught the attention.

He's did very poorly in his HSC in 2013 (mystery mark) and is did a TAFE certificate in software development or something before hand and dreams of doing IT at UTS also. He applied also for University last year but only made it into CQU University (39 ATAR cutoff - this was last year).

After telling him I got into UTS IT, I've noticed a slight change of behaviour of him in the sense that he assumes that I need assistance from him because he is more 'experienced'. What I mean is that he is making and preparing all these powerpoint slides and documents, and even homework for me to do! Also he said that when I get assignments, he also assumes that I will ask him questions and when I do, he won't give me the answer, but just give me an idea about it.

This is absolutely ridiculous! All I just said was I made it into UTS IT and he gave me this speech about 'how to succeed to IT'?? Also, he says that CQU and UWS has a much better IT/Computer department because of its delivery of content to its students? WTF?? Seriously?

What are your suggestions to approach this?

Thanks for your input.

Cheers,
Mike
Click to expand...
Nobody else noticed this!? LOL
 
CaptainPrice

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Well, Will or should I say Mike, will you tell us what's going on? Or do you think we mike not take it very well?
 
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williamliu96

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Sorry guys for the huge confusion with the name. Mike is my nickname that I have been called since Year 6 since I play the ball nearly my whole life and been in rounded/local/state school tournaments. My formal name is William.
 
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williamliu96

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Thanks for your input, but shouldn't I feel pretty bad for him because he put all that effort in making those slides and work? I mean it does look comprehensive, it seems like its a slide from a uni subject. Or he could just copied it from his uni... who knows?

My question/issue is, i dont feel conformable talking about uni/work stuff anymore. I've worked with this major project with him in high-school and it wasn't a pleasant experience. This was a major SDD project for my HSC and he complained a lot of others not doing work and jack crap at us...

Plus he told me his CQU uni results in 2014 was around Passed average with a 'couple of fails', his G.P.A. is like 1.8 out of 6.0. Should this ring alarm bells?
 
strawberrye

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I think a much simpler solution is just to completely ignore him. If you stop replying to his text messages or responses in offering to help, then over time he will get the message. Do this if after you told him kindly when you need help you will ask and he still doesn't stop, then this advice would probably come in handy.
 
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williamliu96

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Yes, having this being a couple of weeks ago when i received my early offer, he has been bringing about me by answering his phone calls, sms, Skype calls, Facebook etc. etc. about 'meetings and sessions' for his 'teaching' on computing. He seems very demanding about it...

Ive mentioned that his G.P.A. is like 1.8 out of 6.0, isn't this bad? His teaching me computing and he himself is in a IT degree yet fails most of his fundamental / core subjects.

Also in one of his powerpoint slides he sent to me, he mentions that during the session, there are strict rules enforced:
- he wants to observe me during the session.
- no talking about nonsense during the session.
- don't ask him direct questions.
- no copying from sources.


He's doing this as if his a teacher or tutor of some sort.

Having this kind of attitude, i wonder why i even wanted to meet/befriend him in the first place. Again i don't want to hurt him in anyway.
 
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dragerx

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Tell him that you learn better through a self directed approach and that it would be more effective(especially time wise) if you just worked independently. You can also mention that you will probably go over his slides and if you ever need help, he will be the first person you come to. Gg problem solved
 
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