Should I break off my friendship...? (1 Viewer)

atletico

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Me and my room mate have been very very close friends for more than 8 months. He has told me stuff that I never thought about him , very very big secrets about him that did not tell other people and I am 2nd person to know some stuff about him.

Now, I am a very generous person, I let my room mate use my laptop, read my books, I helped him with his exams that he later on passed. He insisted in buying his laptop but he needs the cash for the postgraduate studies in a Scandinavian country that I recommended him.

Now, some months ago I told him that I was looking for a job so I could make some cash during my studies.

One day , me, my room mate and my other friend , we met each other and talked about stuff.

My friend started talking to my room mate about their jobs and my friend asked my room mate to talk to his boss and ask for a part time job.

It appears that my room mate is really gonna talk to his boss and get him a part-time job at his work place.

Despite that my room mate knows that I AM LOOKING for a job, he never offered me his help finding a job and instead is going to help my other friend?


How would you react to this? What would you do if you were in my place? Should I break off this friendship as my room mate did not help me and instead helped the other guy to get the job? your input is important

If my friend does get the job, I am thinking to break off this friendship because after being so close friends he did not help me to find the job, after all in a friendship we are supposed to give and take....
 

Pacchiru

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lol i read this thinking of the funniest shit accent ever
 

WannaBang?

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sounds like there's some sexual tension between you three.
 

tommykins

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rofl he gave it to another friend, not some random.
 
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your friend asked your room mate for a job... did you?
 

dood09

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Me and my room mate have been very very close friends for more than 8 months. He has told me stuff that I never thought about him , very very big secrets about him that did not tell other people and I am 2nd person to know some stuff about him.

Now, I am a very generous person, I let my room mate use my laptop, read my books, I helped him with his exams that he later on passed. He insisted in buying his laptop but he needs the cash for the postgraduate studies in a Scandinavian country that I recommended him.

Now, some months ago I told him that I was looking for a job so I could make some cash during my studies.

One day , me, my room mate and my other friend , we met each other and talked about stuff.

My friend started talking to my room mate about their jobs and my friend asked my room mate to talk to his boss and ask for a part time job.

It appears that my room mate is really gonna talk to his boss and get him a part-time job at his work place.

Despite that my room mate knows that I AM LOOKING for a job, he never offered me his help finding a job and instead is going to help my other friend?


How would you react to this? What would you do if you were in my place? Should I break off this friendship as my room mate did not help me and instead helped the other guy to get the job? your input is important

If my friend does get the job, I am thinking to break off this friendship because after being so close friends he did not help me to find the job, after all in a friendship we are supposed to give and take....
after the first line i was 90% sure he had made a move on you it is now awkward

lol
 

Serius

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err no? friendships arent conditional like that. heres how my friendships work:

i give you my friendship, wholly and unconditionally in exchange for yours. thats it.

I help out my friends as much as i can to a certain extent, i "lend" them money and i dont keep track of it, because i would never lend out so much money that i would miss it. I help them out in binds, i look after them. I dont expect the same in return because some of my friends have no money or are busy with work, girlfriends whatever, but i do expect their unconditional loyalty and support

If you continue on this path, cutting off friends for petty slights like this you will end up a very lonely man. I have several friendships for life, in the grand scheme of things over a lifetime of events, is your friend helping out another mate such a bad thing?
 

Luxxey

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Just because you expressed your want for a job first doesn't mean that he doesn't want one/isn't entitled to finding one before you.

That's no reason to break off a friendship. Who keeps tally of 'I did this and this for him therefore he owes me at least this'? :|
 

HalcyonSky

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Me and my room mate have been very very close friends for more than 8 months. He has told me stuff that I never thought about him , very very big secrets about him that did not tell other people and I am 2nd person to know some stuff about him.

Now, I am a very generous person, I let my room mate use my laptop, read my books, I helped him with his exams that he later on passed. He insisted in buying his laptop but he needs the cash for the postgraduate studies in a Scandinavian country that I recommended him.

Now, some months ago I told him that I was looking for a job so I could make some cash during my studies.

One day , me, my room mate and my other friend , we met each other and talked about stuff.

My friend started talking to my room mate about their jobs and my friend asked my room mate to talk to his boss and ask for a part time job.

It appears that my room mate is really gonna talk to his boss and get him a part-time job at his work place.

Despite that my room mate knows that I AM LOOKING for a job, he never offered me his help finding a job and instead is going to help my other friend?


How would you react to this? What would you do if you were in my place? Should I break off this friendship as my room mate did not help me and instead helped the other guy to get the job? your input is important

If my friend does get the job, I am thinking to break off this friendship because after being so close friends he did not help me to find the job, after all in a friendship we are supposed to give and take....
i think Aspergers is the real problem here
 
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You didn't ask him for help to find a job, the other friend did. Boo hoo.
Just because you expressed your want for a job first doesn't mean that he doesn't want one/isn't entitled to finding one before you.

That's no reason to break off a friendship. Who keeps tally of 'I did this and this for him therefore he owes me at least this'? :|

these.

have you tried actually talking to your friend about this? tell him why is distresses you. Be like, "hey man, i saw you offered *insertname* a job and you know i'm looking for one too, is there any chance you could help me out as well?"

honestly though, no reason to end a friendship. You guys sound pretty close, is one little superficial incident really worth losing that?
 

DownInFlames

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Your friend had the initiative to ask. Probably your friend didn't even think about it until your other friend asked.

It's not even a slight. It sounds like you have a pretty good relationship wth your friend. Don't let your stress over trying to find a job, cloud your judgement and ruin friendships.

have you tried actually talking to your friend about this? tell him why is distresses you. Be like, "hey man, i saw you offered *insertname* a job and you know i'm looking for one too, is there any chance you could help me out as well?"
tbh I would feel awkward about asking my boss to give my friends jobs, twice in short succession.
 

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