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An idea? (1 Viewer)

azzie

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I think women should be taught a lesson to be more like men.
Now don't get all feminist on my ass (or anything on my ass thanks) but I've just discovered a secret.

Men have a wonderful way to be detached from much of the emotional side that women are so good at tapping into. This is key. Women care too much about people they like, and relationships in general. Remove the care, and you get fantastic results.


When you don't get attached, when you basically don't care about stuff, stuff has a way of working out brilliantly! Men get so confused when you play their game. But it works a charm.


Does this work for others or is it just my secret that I've now foolishly revealed?
:santa:
 

Tulipa

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It works sometimes.

Not all the time but at the beginning of a relationship it can definitely help.

However when you move forward into a committed relationship BOTH of you need to invest a little emotional time, not a lot, not huge "Dear God where do we stand and how exactly do you feel about me" for hours and hours.

You can't completely emotionally detach though for the duration of a relationship, you would definitely hit a bit of a rut if you did that.
 

ur_inner_child

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I don't know if its "not caring", just moreso being aware of whether you're reading into shit too much, or getting worked up too much.

I dunno, maybe I just have a problem with the wording. Makes it sound like you think men are ruthless or numb.
 

Serius

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You call it being detached and not caring, we simply calling it acting like one has a brain. Just because men dont want to have 5hour D+M's or cry when you dont call us every day doesnt mean we are devoid of emotions, we just look at things logically and so we dont get upset about stupid shit, because thats all it is...stupid.
 

Antler

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Wow that was surprisingly rationale for a woman kathelle :).
 

Atticus.

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az you should officially not ever ever ever give relationship advice to anyone ever
you make the most massive generalisations.

im loathe to start spouting truisms but when it comes to this kind of thing we dont generally externalise emotion to the same extent as humans with vaginas do. man i want a talk show, where you come in and make some statement about men and then me and my hectic crew of hooligans shoot you down
 

Serius

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kathelle said:
Yes because women don't look at things logically, right? I mean it's a given - that lack of Y chromosone makes us irrational fucktards.
emotion and logic are mutually exclusive, if you are spouting on about feelings and how i should be acting towards you and some sort of reference to your friend sally and how SHE is feeling, you arent going to be looking at things objectively and rationally.

Not to say emotion doesnt have its good points, but when rationalising something its best to use your head and not your heart
 

Not-That-Bright

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Remove the care, and you get fantastic results.
What sort of results do you get exactly? If it makes you happier then that's great, but I would have thought you care because caring's the sort of thing you like to do.


P.S. I'm pretty sure your line of thinking here is essentially the basis for the show 'Sex in the City', so no, this isn't anything new.
 
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nwatts

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Serius said:
You call it being detached and not caring, we simply calling it acting like one has a brain. Just because men dont want to have 5hour D+M's or cry when you dont call us every day doesnt mean we are devoid of emotions, we just look at things logically and so we dont get upset about stupid shit, because thats all it is...stupid.
serius you talk as much shit as azzie does
 

misslouisey

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bahahaha breaking lol

wait so, ur saying azzie that girls should just not care bout relationships? that could end pointless, right?
 

Atticus.

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misslouisey said:
bahahaha breaking lol

wait so, ur saying azzie that girls should just not care bout relationships? that could end pointless, right?
mmmmmmhmmmmmmmm
 

MzbLaZeIT

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azzie said:
I think women should be taught a lesson to be more like men.
Now don't get all feminist on my ass (or anything on my ass thanks) but I've just discovered a secret.

Men have a wonderful way to be detached from much of the emotional side that women are so good at tapping into. This is key. Women care too much about people they like, and relationships in general. Remove the care, and you get fantastic results.


When you don't get attached, when you basically don't care about stuff, stuff has a way of working out brilliantly! Men get so confused when you play their game. But it works a charm.


Does this work for others or is it just my secret that I've now foolishly revealed?
:santa:

10 points for captain obvious lol
for some girls its hard to not care, they jst too girly. lol
 

alby

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sorry az, but that really doesnt work with most people, let alone most chicks. as jarad said, just caus guys arent as emotional as some chicks doesnt mean that they have absolutely no feelings...that's just a really really dumb idea!

imo, lack of caring = lack of meaning in life
 

Loz#1

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i've tried the get hard, ice queen, non-caring approach and i can tell you every time i've tried it, i fail miserably. sometimes i'm an irrational, over-emotional woman who wants to have 5 hour deep and meaningfuls and calls her boyfriend a bit too much, but that's just me.
 

Atticus.

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moral of the story is your theory doesnt work for everyone and you shouldnt generalise
/end
 

melsc

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Serius said:
You call it being detached and not caring, we simply calling it acting like one has a brain. Just because men dont want to have 5hour D+M's or cry when you dont call us every day doesnt mean we are devoid of emotions, we just look at things logically and so we dont get upset about stupid shit, because thats all it is...stupid.
Most females aren't like that, females like males are all different, hell my b/f is more like what you described than me.
 

ujuphleg

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If you want to look at it from a philosophical perspective:

random Buddhist thoughts said:
The cultivation of detachment encourages an unselfish appreciation and enjoyment of nature without thought of profit and exploitation. We can also describe the contrast between attached and detached love as the difference between greed and need.
http://www.buddhanet.net/e-learning/buddhism/bs-s13.htm



Personally though I totally agree with Tom - you can't generalise every situation. Its my belief that the ability of females to be more sensitive is often both their greatest weakness AND their greatest strength, for if the world was totally emotionally detached, can you imagine the eventual consequences?

Rather, it is our ability to feel (both male and female) which is what makes us human (I think that was in a Harry Potter book- Dumbledore quotes!) and whilst getting hurt is, obviously, painful, it can only serve to be a positive if we choose to grasp it with both hands and learn from the experience.

Buddhism also teaches a middle path, so going from one extreme to another (ie, totally attached to utterly detached) must be a bad thing. The key here is probably compassionate understanding...

/philosophical ramblings....
 

Atticus.

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ujuphleg said:
If you want to look at it from a philosophical perspective:



http://www.buddhanet.net/e-learning/buddhism/bs-s13.htm



Personally though I totally agree with Tom - you can't generalise every situation. Its my belief that the ability of females to be more sensitive is often both their greatest weakness AND their greatest strength, for if the world was totally emotionally detached, can you imagine the eventual consequences?

Rather, it is our ability to feel (both male and female) which is what makes us human (I think that was in a Harry Potter book- Dumbledore quotes!) and whilst getting hurt is, obviously, painful, it can only serve to be a positive if we choose to grasp it with both hands and learn from the experience.

Buddhism also teaches a middle path, so going from one extreme to another (ie, totally attached to utterly detached) must be a bad thing. The key here is probably compassionate understanding...

/philosophical ramblings....
agreed on all fronts except for "the key"
the key is not over analysing and just chilling the fuck out
 

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