HSC suicides and depression (1 Viewer)

[greenapple^0^]

ooo the emotional pain goin through during the hsc ..u no its not just the hsc but the whole being year 12 is just a big thing..starting from family, friends, school works..i've realise dat there is so little time dat it makes me panic which isn't good at all and doing two drama performaces hahaha now dats so freakin stressing...i don't know y but i'm goin to through some problems but i'm handling them right now, i just think the best way is to go out have a little un even it's only 1hr but have heaps of fun well dat works for me..or the best thing is just cry~ cry till all ur anger ur problems come out~ dats the best solution for moi the best~!!! get's all my stress out anywayz..yeah like other people says about other countires mostly "asians" which i do agree on mannn they go through so much there is so much suicides there, the stress parents give them and friends too....thank god i'm here and my parents arn't dat bad.... so just have ur own time but don't stay in a quiet place coz it makes u think.....deep which sometimes doesn't turn out good as u could think bit too much~

 

[55078]

i have, but i have a general history of depression and mental illness/anorexia - which is why i'm 20 and still haven't finished the hsc (which makes it worse, because i'm upset about that as well).

oh wow, that's exactly the same as my situation (depression/eating disorder).

I was supposed to have finished the HSC last year, but I had a nervous breakdown halfway through because of too much external stresses. It all ended up exacerbating by existing problems and caused me to become very mentally and physicall weak (my eating issues got very out of hand).

Some people are just more prone to worrying about things (I know that, for me, it was largely due to my perfectionistic personality and the inability to accept anything other than the absolute best which led me to go crazy thinking about the possibilty of having my "final" school marks being second-rate).

There's not much point in telling someone who is over-stressing about it that it "doesn't matter how well they do" or that "the HSC is not the be all and end all", because they probably need to work it out for themselves.

I'm much more relaxed about the idea of it all now, after seeing that a lot of people who are not as clever as myself managed to get very reasonable marks and do just fine overall. I hope that I can maintain this calmness when I go back to school later in the year to finish the HSC.

 

[housemouse]

a mate of mine recently hung himself over the hsc - thought he was useless, thought he was letting his family down etc.

ediisjoz never feel like you are letting your family down. they love you for YOU not because of some mark. your UAI is not who YOU are.. *hugs* hang in there, not too much longer

I thought that last bit was ironic.

 

[adgala]

personally, when year 12 started and i found out more about uni, i've realised i just needed to get into uni whether i need 75 or 99, the hsc is insignificant after that, i guess that's what makes me want to enjoy year 12 even more knowing its my final year instead of stressing overtime about the hsc, stress comes naturally and i've accepted that especially when exams come and i really need to work harder but apart from that, i've never contemplated suicide or depression at all this year

 

[greenapple^0^]

nice idea, however some people prefer not to cry. *hugs* to you anyway.

*hugs* to anyone who needs it atm. <3 all.

oooo thanks~ dats so sweet

 

[sleepplease]

housemouse.. i see what you mean, oh dear, slightly sick pun not intented

 

[emilybrown]

people get stressed out by the tiny little things lik th HSC. you need to realise that there alot of other options out if you dont get the marks you want. stressing about your marks isn't worth it.
the though of suicide has gone through my head over school, comitting suicide over an exam or thinking bout isn't worth the stress and hurt it will cause your family and friends.
JUST STAY CALM AND DONT STRESS. IF YOU STAY CALM AND DONT WORRY BOUT EXAMS YOU WILL DO BETTER THAN YOU THOUGH YOU WOULD

 

[*Ninny-mole*]

I don't know if I would say I have contemplated suicide, but I've contemplated death if that makes sense?... I sometimes find myself thinking that dying would be okay, (and this is usually when I'm driving home from school, or an exam - not the best combination). Alot of school friends get worried that I stress too much,but the fact that I haven't killed myself yet, after failing english altogether, is a good indication nothing will happen. I am not depressed, but I do get very upset by the HSC. I have a huge fear of failure and don't like the fact that after going pretty well in my subjects up until Year 11, it is when it most counts that I can't do it.
Hmmm, I don't know why I'm telling everyone this...

 

[yal14h]

By now you should all know my opinion on suicide.

But as far as the HSC goes, I'm not stressing. It's MY hsc- not my parents, teachers, friends or family (I go to a selective school so there's considerably more pressure). I'm doing it the lazy way, but it's my way.

Also, if you can't handle the HSC then you'd better change something, because out there in the real world you'll meet a lot more stressful things than a few memory tests aka HSC exams. For your own sake, learn how to handle stress, otherwise you won't go anywhere.

 

[Datto120]

I believe the majority of hsc related suicides are from kids in families where they have to get a uai of 90 and above or they are worthless. Families were parents think the uai needed for a course is all that matters when picking one not that you want to work as something with a low uai. And teh parents who carry on when their kids get 80 marks in tests because 80 is just good enough!

Its not the hsc, it each individuals home life and school life it depends on the pressure put on them.

Or fail that the kid has depression and is pretty much a time bomb its going to happen eventually whether its a failed attempt or suicide.

 

[Leggs]

i dont think that people actually commit suicide purely because of the hsc...i mean you dont go along completely fine for 6 years, hit the hsc and decide "oh well this sucks, better go kill myself"
the hsc is like the final push that just drives the person over the edge, they have to have had problems before it to actually consider doing something like that

 

[fallen__angel]

I started spiralling down in depression from the end of yr11 to around term 2 this year.
Yes I am one of those kids whose parents put you down just because I got 80% in my latest assessment. And yes, my parents are asian; and they are the kind of people who were at the top of their academic scales in their days.
The reason why I attempted suicide was because I got a meagre 62% for a bio exam. My normal marks were usually around 90%. My mum is a bio teacher, and I'm been so confident in my bio knowledge that I just lost it. I won't give details into what methods I used in self-harm, just in case some desperate soul out there reads this.

I later realised that it was clinical depression, not just some feeble brooding thoughts. The BeyondBlue people told me that I was lucky in getting out of it all by myself - I was so occupied with my depression I didn't want to get out of it. My parents knew nothing, and suspected nothing.

It's not the HSC exams that makes one feel depressed. For me, it was more like the concept of dissapointing my parents who have put so much into my education. The concept of being a high-achiever, then having everything crashing down. And it hurts, when parents compare you to other impossible students and pressure you to do the same. It feels like as though you're just some sub-standard thing that needs to be upgraded or replaced.

"I used to stand so tall. I used to be so strong.
Now I can't breathe. No I can't sleep.
I'm barely hanging on"

I'm glad that I got out of it so I could have enough time to patch up on my crap marks. I don't know if I can reach my goal of UAI 85+, but I'm trying the best I can now. Bit worried though, cos depression tends to come back and drag you back to the darkness. Just focus on the brighter side of life.

btw I apologise for such a long post >.<''

 

[Rebecca1234]

Hi guys! I am currently just beginning year 12 as all of you guys are doing your HSC now. I was just searching through a few of your forums and i come accross this one! A few of my friends in year 11 tried tp suicide because it was hard alot of people have told them that if they can not handle year 11 they are not going to last in year 12. Guys i know i can not comment as i am not in your position, doing my HSC of yet, but i must say, stress is bad for when your exams are going on! Jus relax, suicide should be the last thing you think of, but yeah, the end result is what counts. I put myself under alot of pressure, by trying to be ahead of everyone else, and i studies loads! But at the end of the day, if my uai sucks, there are many other options, such as tafe, principals recommendation into a uni! Who knows! Jus hold your head high everyone! And goodluck, i do hope all of your results reach high and you do well! Love yas

 

[HinikuTheNinja]

I'm like Fallen_Angel. Except I've been pretty much in-the-dumps since year 9... at least, that's when I remember starting to see I had symptoms of depression - or bipolar disorder. It got progressively worse, and when, early in year 11, someone asked if I was cutting, I said no. Turned out I had a shit day at school, went home, found something sharp, and lo and behold Mig and sharp things became friends.

The piling on of stress from parentals, a forboding sense of loneliness and feeling like I bleonged nowhere, had no one to turn to, and even if I did, could not talk to them because I have trouble trusting and communicating, lead to me trying to kill myself after my year 11 yearly English exams. There were a whole bunch of other factors, not just fear of failing the exam (turned out I got 90%, so I don't know what I was worried about at the time...) but also stuff that really screwed up my self-esteem, confidence, and the like.

You know what, though? I stopped, halfway through trying to commit suicide. Partly because I freaked out at the amount of blood I saw from such a tiny wound. Partly because I was afraid. Partly because I didn't want to hurt my family and friends. Partly because I thought that maybe, just maybe, tomorrow would be a better day. It just so happened that the next day, a guy I'd met on the weekend asked me to go out with him, I bonded with a friend, and spent the next three months happyhappy.

Since then I've tried it a couple of times, but each time I've chickened out. Mostly because of the thought of hurting my parents and family was too much for me. This doesn't make sense, but it does in my head. There were times I felt that no one cared for me, that the world would be better without me, yaddayaddayadda. I have it all in my lj to prove it. But all the same, I didn't want to hurt them. Or something.

...okay, I have no idea what I'm going on about anymore, so I'm just going to shut up and sit back in a corner and sulk. ^_^ what fun.

 

[dagwoman]

^ I would seriously suggest you go talk to a psychologist or your GP. I've been there too, and I can tell you that things get a hell of a lot better when you get a professional opinion and some support.

 

[HinikuTheNinja]

^ I've tried, once. I had to go to the doctor for something, and I was trying as hard as I could to talk to her about the depression part, but couldn't open my mouth to speak. I beat myself up for it afterwards. Part of the reason why I tried it that first time. Sigh.
Oh well. I can only try again. To talk to a professional, that is. =S

 

[dagwoman]

Make another appointment just to talk about the depression. I admit that it is pretty daunting, going and having a full-on conversation to someone you don't exactly know that well, but it's worth it. Take a friend in with you for support if you're nervous, if taking a parent or family member isn't an option for you.

I really hope it works out for you.

 

[yal14h]

*This is not a post tying to pay anyone out*

With that out of the way, fallen__angel and HinikuTheNinja, I just wanna ask you... why? I mean, did you think that killing yourselves would solve your problems or make them go away, or was it the only option left, or what?

If your parents were putting too much pressure on you, why didn't you just talk to them- tell them that their pressure is just making things worse and worse.

I just don't understand it/ could you to explain it to me.

 

[*Ninny-mole*]

I can't speak for other people, but I find that when I'm upset, talking to people is the hardest thing. Despite the support of my family and friends, there are still alot of issues that I can't talk to them about. I used to get pressured alot by my parents until Year 10 when I was so stressed I started vomiting before my SC exams. Now, they try not to pressure me (though they do use "subtle" hints), but I can't stop acting like nerdish emo mole, because most of the pressure comes from within. That's the same in nearly every aspect of my life. There are things I cannot even tell my best-friends because I know that they won't understand. I certainly can't speak to a stranger about them (ironically, I'm kind of doing that now...). Sometimes, I feel like no-one will ever understand how I feel and it eats away at me. But the point to this rather long post is, that although I can't bring myself to talk about stuff, I really need to. And that will be the same situation alot of others are in also. The feeling that they can't talk to anyone regardless of how much support they have. Okay, this all made sense in my head...not so much when it's written...

 

[Fitness]

My mate said that no one ever asks him bout his UAI. He finished a couple of years ago. I dont really know what hes studying - I know he works close to home in a govt dept - I think accounts o somethin- I dont really care about that part - I just like to chat & hangout. We're mates.
He's got a girlfriend and its all cool.
Her friends are cool too.