Rules for Customers (9 Viewers)

[Kirsti]

Steakhouse:

* Do NOT, in any circumstance, drop your rib bones on the floor when you are finished with them. Put them on the side of your plate or on a napkin for god's sake.
* Your kids are not cute. If they trip me over and I spill your meal, it is not my fault.
* If you walk into me while I'm carrying something and it spills, it is not my fault.
* The kids menu if for children under 12. Occassionally 14-15 year olds get away with it. 30 year olds can not! Just order a small meal. You can survive without your free ice cream.
* On Kids Eat Free Night, do not pretend that 7 of your kids are in the toilets so you can get 7 free meals.
* Don't make lame jokes about not wanting the bill
* Don't let your kids sit on the decorations. They will fall off the wall, your kid will crack his head on the ground and die
* When I am clearing plates for you, don't say "Wow you're doing well, what if I make it harder for you?" and proceed to stack me up with 27 unbalanced plates all dripping with gravy

 

[table for 1]

haha...it's funny reading through these posts... except i cbb reading though everything

sorry if this has been repeated

restaurant
1. yes, that annoying whirring noise is because you are standing with the door opened. if you just popped in to get a menu, that's cool. if you're standing there, but also inquiring about something, kindly close the door so i can hear you, and so i do not give you the wrong information
2. quit stealing our yr/s old mags. we're a small restaurant. we can't afford to buy new mags everytime you steal some, and frankly, i don't think you deserve the priviledge of new mags [note: thanks to those who have donated their old mags because ppl keep stealing ours]
3. don't shove a thick folded mag into the back pocket of your pants, fully in view [not even bothering to cover it with your shirt], and expect me to be blind. even though i won't say anything [i'd rather lose a mag than make you not want to come again], i'll remember you always. be careful next time you order a meal
4. don't swear in my restaurant. especially if there are other ppl dining there, and especially if there are children
5. do not touch the plants we have around the restaurant. they may be pretty, but you're grimy fingers may just poison [or rip off] their leaves
6. stop stealing our salt shakers/etc ! wtf is wrong with you??
7. [although no one has asked, i've thought of answers in case someone wants to be bitchy.]
a) those things you see inside the salt shakers are not bugs, they are in fact raw rice having being fried. this allows any mositure inside the salt shaker to be absorbed, to prevent clumping of the salt, and it will not kill you, or cause you to be violently ill
b) the droplets on the lid of the salt shaker is just water. there is moisture in the air, usually during rainy days. since salt is highly reactive with water, the salt reacts with the moisture in the air and forms water droplets on the lid. yes, sometimes the above a) is insufficient in preventing this due to larger amounts of moisture
8. if you get sauce on the table, please wipe it with the napkins we provide you with. the sauce tends to dry and cake on the table, making it much harder for us to clean, especially if the air conditioner is on
9. eat properly - how can you get so much food on the floor?? vacuuming the whole floor of a restaurant is tiring, and you're not making it any easier, jackass
10. do not stare (unsmiling) while i bring out your food, it's rude. especially if i went straight to work after being out with friends, and haven't had a chance to change, so am still wearing that mini and tank at night.
11. it's nice to say 'thank you' when i give you stuff, though, only optional
12. stop pestering me for your bill - i'm taking orders from ppl who are standing and waiting, from ppl who call up and will not let the phone ring forever, checking other's orders to make sure their order is correct. i'll give you your bill when i'm done putting your food into a doggy bag, and checking your total to ensure you will not get ripped off.
13. if ordering over the phone, speak clearly and do not use a mobile. mobiles tend to drop off a bit, causing me to miss a meal or two, or mishear your order for a similarly named one, or mishear the quantity you wanted. so sorry if you are short a meal, or get a different meal, and consequently, your total is higher/lower than you expected
14. please, while ordering through the phone, do not ask me to add up your total, unless you are patient. sometimes, it can take a while. maybe to you it's easy to remember the prices of all 200-something items. we give out menus with prices on them for a reason
15. if you want many containers of sauces, and you do not order any meal/entree needing this sauce, do not find it odd we charge you 50c. even the plastic containers cost more than that
16. fine, buy a bottle of coke from the deli across the road if its 20c cheaper. use our glasses and make us wash them. take our straws. but do not expect me to give you ice if i'm pissed off.
17. fine, don't leave a tip if you make me walk back and forth to follow you stupid commands: i want chilli/soya sauce, i want fresh chopped chilli. can i have some more spoons [even though i've given you a set, and place one on every meal i bring out]. can i have a coke? no, make that d coke [when i bring it out]. the damned fridge it near the back of the restaurant. etc etc
18. stop pestering me about your meals. so sorry you caught us in our busy rush. so sorry we are only equipped with 2 chefs who do not have 300 arms. so sorry your meal is particularly harder to make even though we don't charge you that bit extra. so sorry the oil is still heating up before we can fry your fatty food because we only just opened and haven't turned our fryer on yet, or leave it on while no one is there so it can catch on fire and burn the place down
19. yeah, break and chip our plates/etc and then complain that it's chipped
20. no, that hair in your soup does not belong to us - none of us have curly hair. but we will take it back and cook you another, or remove the charge, jsut because we're nice
21. don't you dare smoke in my restaurant. apart from the smell being crap, and us all have to endure those toxic fumes which cause the cilias in our throats from working for 8 hrs, so we are more susceptible to pathogens and the sort, the owner will get fined $4000 - $5000 for your ignorance of our signs and health

i could go on and on...but i think i'll stop my ramblings there

 

[modelzsuck]

kylie!!! theres a computer out the back like 10m away!!

guess what.. i worked in home ent tonight for like 2 hours cause they didnt roster anyone on. I had no fuckin idea what i was doin.. i think Pauline was getting pissed off cause i kept asking her questions when customers came up to me hahahaha i found it hilarious.

Yeah even if I look it up theres a 50% cahnce the computer is wrong and then there is a 95% chance that i cant find it, obviously youve never looked in the home ent lockup, theres shit everywhere, its not even in any order, and even out in the store, all those dvds under the actual dvds on display arent in any order, who knows what the fuck is under there. lol.

 

[jumb]

Generally speaking, the managers are useless and will tell you exactly the same thing as me. However, they're all wussies compared to me.

 

[hiphophorray123]

lone star:

1) you will sit where ur fucking told to...no 'oh but its too cold here i want a booth'

2) when were on a wait there are going to be people who have been waiting longer than you...ur not fuckign first you dumb bitch 'oh but theres a booth there u just dnt want to give it to me!'

3) don't give me ur fkn bills i couldn't be fucked running ur credit card through the machine

4) don't ask me to take ur plates away ask ur waitress

5) don't tip the waitresses tip me

6) im a HOST i do not, nor can i be fucked, taking orders, and yes that includes glasses of pepsi...i only use the drink machine if its to get myself a drink

7) if you can't speak english there is a reason why i sat you in the section of the waitress i don't like. Don't ask, or try to ask, to move, u'll ruin my fun

8) if you walk out without paying, do it why im not at the door, that way the waitresses don't blame me....how the fuck am i spossed to know that they've payed or not.

9) don't be impatient and fussy....we are not there to serve you and only you.

10) if your an old white woman with a racist attitude don't bother coming into lone star...and if so...be careful when your in the parking lot.

 

[Arvin Sloane]

10) if your an old white woman with a racist attitude don't bother coming into lone star...and if so...be careful when your in the parking lot.

Nothing like a gang rape to end the night.

 

[_Bushra_]

BIGW RULES (more)

- I get intimidated by teenagers (especially if they're wogs, no offence anyone) so please do not come through my register
- Dont think youre better than me cus I'm in uniform and your wearing the shortest skirt that you own
- None of us check out girls need any attention from gross sleazy men. Please go away and let us do our job
- Please dont come through my register if you are old and sporting tiny g strings and sexy underwear. It makes me feel inadequate
- Please refrain from making too much conversation. A "Hello, how are you" is fine but please stop there
- Get your fucking kids away from the table scanner. Dont complain that I have overcharged you when obviously your dirty kid has scanned the item twice/thrice
- DO NOT under any circumstance, continue to shop when the announcement goes out that we are closing. Get your fucking arses to the registers
- When YOU ask for a pricecheck DO NOT COMPLAIN ABOUT WAITING
- When its the end of the night and I am obviously tired and annoyed, DO NOT hoot loudly in my face " HEY - LO, BUSHRA! YOU LOOK TIRED!" etc. I am not in the mood. Go away

 

[hiphophorray123]

why do u get intimaidated by wog teenagers, they only act, they aren't hard at all.

 

[Scanorama]

unfortunatly yes i experienced this today as one ladies arse was hanging out of the changeroom

LOL this is funny

 

[zenger69]

PIZZA SHOPS (Like PIZZA HUT):
-Be patient at takeaway stores as there's only one cashier and make sure you line up as the single cashier wouldn't know who came in first.
-If someone pushes in, grow-up and not complain about it to the cashier but tell the person off.
-If you were promised 15 minutes for your pizza. Don't expect it to take exactly 15 minutes, sometimes we make them faster or make them slower depending on how busy it is.
-Do not ask anything for free just because your pizza was late.
-Don't lie how your pizza did not satisfy you when everyone on is clearly experienced. I can tell if you just want free products.
-Never shout at the person in the store just because your delivery didn't arrive on time. Go and shout at the driver and ask the driver why it took them so long to get to your place.
-When your picking up pizzas, come in with a name or several names (as everyone in the family has had a go at ordering) or at least know what your ordered. So I can find them properly.
-Don't expect to pay for a $3.95 pizza with eftpos/credit card or $100 notes. Because the bank doesn't take $3.95 transactions and the cashier will never have enough change in their till.
-If your waiting for your pizza, go and sit down. Don't stand their and stare up me, that won't make us complete your order quicker.
-If you want to swap ingredients, the computer will charge you extra to be fair to all customers, so don't whinge.
-Yes there is a chicken surchage and pizzas and don't complain about that either. The chicken at pizza hut is 100% Chicken wheareas the mince beef is full of what Jamie Oliver calls "Shite or Shit".
-All because you say "Keep the Change" when paying for a pizza (usually 5cents) doesn't make you a hot shot and also I don't get paid enough to sit there at night and count up all those little five cent pieces. So take your change.

Thats about all I have to whinge about.

 

[Atticus.]

so many reps have been awarded from me for awesome rules in this thread...
some people really hate their jobs

 

[_muse_]

IF I LOOK SICK.. DONT COME THROUGH MY REGISTER AND TELL ME I LOOK LIKE SHIT!!!! it makes me feel worse and makes YOU look like a fuckin cunt.

 

[Carlito]

People who think theyre the only person in the store who wants help and dont understand why you dont drop everything to help them when you are clearly talking to someone else or doing something for someone else.

Customers comming in and saying "Hi I spoke to you last month remember me?" Then they think because I served them before that I am now their best friend and will give them better service. No I dont remember you, I spoke to hundreds of people last month.

And people who read my name tag and call me by name, especially because I lost my nametag so now I just wear random names.

People who say they saw $100+ items on sale for 50c and wonder why I get annoyed at having to come up to the registers and talk to them about it. Also pisses me off is the checkout staff actually call me up to check!

When people ask me if we sell product x and I tell them we dont and then they proceed to say 'but it said in a magazine I read on a plane in 1985 that you sold this here so you have to have it now where do you keep it?'

People who think we have an unlimited supply of all stock and say they are going to sue us for false advertising because we have sold out of an item thats advertised as on special. Sorry, but you're not the only person in the world who wanted to buy it and if you decide to turn up on the last day of the sale thats your problem not mine.

People who cant read and want to get XXXL for the price of a Small. Also people who see "30% off Brand X queen bed sheets" and think it means "30% off any sheet, or sheet set" or "30% of anything to do with bedding".... It annoys me so much I usually say "Show me where it says that and I'll give it to you for 50% off". No one's taken me up on the offer yet.

 

[_Bushra_]

why do u get intimaidated by wog teenagers, they only act, they aren't hard at all.

I just start freaking out when theyre around...Ive come across some really rude and pathetic ones

 

[Casmira]

- Please refrain from making too much conversation. A "Hello, how are you" is fine but please stop there

I disagree I sell power tools and some guy that was 7 years old when WW2 started gave me a 20min talk about them, I was actually intruiged, imagine being only 7 and the whole world is at war D: I've seen him twice he always comes in and talks to the workers for a long time, I don't mind to be honest, after talking he always feels more convinced to buy stuff

 

[Arvin Sloane]

And people who read my name tag and call me by name, especially because I lost my nametag so now I just wear random names.

That's the way -- punish others for your gross incompetence.

Hear me will children -- this is exactly how communism starts.

 

[llamalope]

Rules for Baker's Delight

1. When there is a completely full tray of something, do not make me dislocate my arm trying to reach for a specific cheese and bacon roll located right at the front. They are all the same.
2. Do not come to me at 8:00 on a sunday morning and expect EVERYTHING to be baked and put away on the shelves. I am not a baker. It is not my fault that we only have 9 ovens.
3. likewise, do not come to my at 5:00 and expect there to be one of everything left. Bread is popular, therefore people buy it.
4. At 6:00 or 7:00 when there is nothing left on the shelves and i have just turned off the front lights, do not expect me to serve you. I have turned off the lights because we are closed.
5. To the bitch who harassed me at easter... there comes a limit as to how many hot cross buns one can physically make in a single day. We had made over 6000 (no joke), and we are not going to set aside one packet just on the off chance that you might come. There is only so much you can fit in an oven. It is your fault for not coming earlier in the day.
6. Do not ask if you can change your mind after i have rung up your purchase. I cannot erase my last transaction, and it is your fault if you are indicisive
7. Do not make me bag up a shit-load of stuff and then have to leave it here for 3 hours because you don't have enough money.
8. If you ask me to slice 4 block loaves, do not look impatient if it takes time. If you wanted pre-sliced bread, go buy that shit from woolworths. It'll be stale by the time you get it home.
9. Do not under any circumstances ask me if i could do tasters of a particular product that you want to buy just because you think you have the priviledge of 'try before you buy'. You dont.
10. If there are 20 people standing next to you, do not take 10 mintues to make up your mind
11. Similarly, if there are 30 customers at once, there are only to or three of us. We will serve you as soon as we can.

edit: if I am dressed up as breadhead, do not punch me when I try to shake you hand. I do not like wearing that suit, as it is very hot and sweaty and i can't see where I'm going. In addition, do not get grumpy at me when i can't see you 3 year old who hardly comes up to my knees. I am trying to give out as much free stuff as i can, but I can't see the floor. My range of vision is severly restricted. Breadhead is a SILENT character. If you insist on speaking to me, do not be surprised that i am a female. I am the only one who can fit into the bread suit.

administration at a Ballet school

1. Do not try to intimidate me. I may look young, but I have been there for 18 years as a student...i know how things work by now.
2. Do not ring me up and then come in next term expecting me to remember you. I talk to thousands of parents a day. I can't remember everybody's name.
3. I am wearing a badge. I am not a random cleaner. If I ask you to leave the corridor because parents are not allowed to watch classes until open day, do so. I do not have the time to argue with you.
4. Do not expect me to disturb a class just because you want to talk on the phone to the teacher. She will ring you back.
5. If there is a queue of busy mother and fathers simply paying bills, and you have 1000 questions that require time to answer, do not be offended if i ask to speak with you in 5 minutes.
6. Just because you think your son in the next Michail Barishnikov, doesn't mean the teachers do. Do not complain to me that he didn't get a solo in this year's performance.

 

[MissMacbeth]

1: Don't chuck a fit at me just because you can't find something by not looking properly.
2: Don't get all sh*tty at me just because we don't take flybuys (woolies)
3: Don't ask me if I'm open when my light is on, I'm standing there looking at you and there is no 'Closed' sign to be seen. Open your damn eyes! (still not gutsy enough to say 'no' yet when ppl ask me that stupid question...give me time!)
4: If you see a checkout person rushing to the staff room, don't ask them for help - clearly they are in a hurry to either sign on/sign off/break or whatever...it really pisses me off. I know to you customers it sounds lame, but with 10min to have a break and with you asking me stupid questions, I end up with no food in my stomach, no coffee and no wind down time equalling a starving, pissed off staff memeber not in the mood to take your sh*t when you come thru my checkout. Get a clue and let me have my break!

N.B. I must commend my customers today for being very patient with the huge line up. Long story short - the supervising was sh*t and I was left on my own with 50 customers all waiting. It took the supervisor about 15 min to realise this and called the worst of checkout staff to service 80...(one's who don't listen to it and dwadle...) 10 minutes later another checkout person came on, and by the time there were maybe 10 ppl left, about 6 checkout ppl turned up...it was such a waste of time. It happens to me every Saturday!

But anyway! The point is, all the 50 customers were champs, got their magazines out and happily waited. I commed you all!!!!

Evil thought: You guys know how the scanner that records your scan rate average is corrupt...(I haven't changed my pace since working there and it thinks I scan at 10 items per min...how fcuking slow would you have to be to do that!!!!!!!) well every so often the supervisor tells me I have to go faster b/c of my record....well, I've decided that next time they say that to me on the saturdays they leave me on my own......I am stopping dead in my tracks and will refuse to work until they appologise and get more staff members within 10min to help me...not 35min like today!

 

[MissMacbeth]

Oh oh! Story relating to customers trying to intimidate!!

ok...serving a customer in Express and I was simply listening to her day while packing her bag, knowing fully well there was a guy behind her next in the que. I never stopped to talk, I always believe in the saying "if you wanna talk, you've gotta work at the same time or don't talk at all." Anyway...there were two other girls on express with me doing odd jobs behind me so either one could serve him. Finally one noticed the guy and began to serve him when he started b*tching and complaining about me. At this stage, he had only been standing there waiting for about 40 seconds b/c I watched him line up, so he has no right to complain. ANYWAY! I said goodbye to my customer and then the guy began by trying to intimidate me.

(Customers be warned!

If I have been doing nightfill shifts from 8pm to midnight for the last three nights, and each morning after having to get up at 8am to go to uni, THEN after all this, spend a 9 hour shift on checkouts the following morning...I'm going to be pretty damn tired and snappy and ready to bite your head off at any given moment!)

So, the guy began by saying...get this! I was bad at customer service b/c I was talking to a customer....*shrugs shoulders...* and preceeded to abuse me and my friend on express, while threatening to see the manager etc...
Instead of freaking out, I started talking back and telling him he's insane and should go to Coles if he wants to feel a man by intimidating ppl and my friend and I were laughing in his
face everytime he tried to threaten us! It was the most fun I've ever had!!!

(no offence Coles ppl but it was the only store I could think of at the time!)

 

[It]

These all relate to my experiences at woolworths working in produce from my shift today:

1. Do not pull the overhead plastic bag things like ur starting a fucking lawnmower. pulling them hard and fast does not tear just one bloody bag. take ur time and do it and it will be much simpler and u wont leave bits and pieces of plastic bag everywhere for my to fkn clean up.

2. dont go to gloria jeans and buy ur little coffee in a cup to sip on while ur shopping then decide to just leave it on the displays. if u must drink a fkn coffee while u shop (i dont see y ne1 needs to do this) then put the fkn cup in the bloody bins!

3.do not let ur stupid inbred children with snot covered fingers mess up the apple displays.

4.if u decide u dont want something after putting it in a bag, dont just leave it laying there for me to clean up.

5.if we dont have something u want, then too bad, dont get shitty with me. i cant click my fingers and make it appear for u.

6.if im clearly in produce ie.in apron and stacking fruit from a trolley, dont come up to me and expect me to know how much a roll of foil is. if u must do that, then dont u fucking dare get shitty wiht me when i have to go get a price check at the registers for u- i dont know (or care) how much the foil is! Worse still is when i get told "what bloody use are you then" if i dont know the price of the foil and need to have it checked. wld u prefer i made some number up so u cld bitch and complain at the register about how i lied to u?

7.if u think something is too expensive, go fucking grow it in ur backyard, i dont wana hear about it. prices have changed since the 1950's.