What is so good about being a virgin? (1 Viewer)

[soha]

so guys wats so good bout being a virgin.... back on topic here

we dont have to use contraception
no condoms..no pills..no worries
thats the best ive got for now

 

[Lainee]

couple things here. you have something to say about religion and virginity? make a new thread. don't post it in here.

you have something new to say about it in a more social context? or to answer any questions i have posed? go ahead and put them down.

Well, your original question was: "What is so wonderfully fantastic about being a virgin? Why is it such a pure and virtuous thing?" And you're not letting people answer 'Because my religion influences me think that way'?! What do you want people to say? That they've been socially pressured into thinking that way and are totally wrong about it? ...


Hmmmmm... basically virginity is not fantastic, not in a universal sense anyway. It's just a part of who you are at this point in time - like saying "I'm single at the moment". It doesn't carry any sense of good or bad unless you attribute a sense of good or bad to it. (And many people do this due to religious influence.) It's a personal decision you make, which in your own opinion, you believe to be the best one for you. Maybe keeping one's virginality gives the person a sense of being pure and virtuous - maybe having regular sex is satisfying your normal human desires. It doesn't matter as long as people make the choices that suit with their system of values.

and lainee - your decisions make up your personality, thus your decision to not have sex also contributes to it. see the key word there? contributes not completely makes it up, there are far greater things to give than sex.

And I totally agree with you, it doesn't make sex not important though, and doesn't diminish the importance of virginity. Yes, there are things that people may perceive to be more important - but I don't think anyone defines themselves as a virgin - full stop - and nothing else. Being a virgin is just a part of who you are at this point in time.

 

[ur_inner_child]

problem with using "religion" as a reason why being a virgin is so good is just like saying "cuz my mummy said so"

if you truly believed that being a virgin is good in relation to religion, you'd have solid reasons that don't necessarily tie in with religion

for example

"i will be giving something special to the person I marry, who would be the person I love and will want to spend the rest of my life with"

or

"I don't want to give into the temptation of giving something special to someone who I think I love, but wouldn't necessarily want to spend the rest of my life with"

or

"I believe it is something you can only give away once, and I want to give it to someone that loves me for me, and would want to spend the rest of my life with etc"

not

"cuz God says so".

 

[beccaxx]

they r all reasons i say.
i think i would still value sex way highly if i wasnt religious.
its the closest u can physically get 2 someone, so i wana keep that 4 the person i wana b closest with 4ever

 

[jumb]

"cuz God says so".

That's the most generic and frustrating reason.

 

[beccaxx]

im the bestest

 

[Lainee]

problem with using "religion" as a reason why being a virgin is so good is just like saying "cuz my mummy said so"

if you truly believed that being a virgin is good in relation to religion, you'd have solid reasons that don't necessarily tie in with religion

for example

"i will be giving something special to the person I marry, who would be the person I love and will want to spend the rest of my life with"

or

"I don't want to give into the temptation of giving something special to someone who I think I love, but wouldn't necessarily want to spend the rest of my life with"

or

"I believe it is something you can only give away once, and I want to give it to someone that loves me for me, and would want to spend the rest of my life with etc"

not

"cuz God says so".

I think all those reasons are part of my decision to wait until marriage. But I'm not going to judge people whose reason is just purely 'because God says so', it's their choice to make their decisions based on faith alone.

 

[ur_inner_child]

I think all those reasons are part of my decision to wait until marriage. But I'm not going to judge people whose reason is just purely 'because God says so', it's their choice to make their decisions based on faith alone.

i don't judge. i don't think its just an adequete reason.

It's not a faith if you nod and say yes because God says so. You're not a Christian if you do that. That's just being a sponge.

You have to TRULY believe its right.

I suppose I judge to an extent. Christianity surpasses the word of the bible, because following the bible as a basis of faith is not what Christianity is all about. You have to have inside you, and TRULY believe in it.

Why is it that Christians think they're Christians and justify so by saying "well I got to church every Sunday" or "well I abstain sex until marriage" rather than saying "I'm Christian because I truly believe that Jesus died for us, that he is our saviour, and what he did was beautiful"...?

So, in otherwords, "Because God says so" as a reasoning for abstaining sex needs to go further than that

 

[Tulipa]

lainee- yes, my original question did have answers having to do with religion but after hearing FAR too much on that, i wanted to look at it in a more social context.

is it possible for people to do that?

i'm starting to think not. i guess asking people to think more about themselves and what their views are based on society is a little too hard.

 

[pantha-princess]

sarah im sorry that this has happened...
some people really are ignorant

im suprised laraB hasnt come here to say something stupid

are you talking to me?

 

[AsyLum]

lainee- yes, my original question did have answers having to do with religion but after hearing FAR too much on that, i wanted to look at it in a more social context.

is it possible for people to do that?

i'm starting to think not. i guess asking people to think more about themselves and what their views are based on society is a little too hard.

The problem is that the question of individual vs. social expectations differ greatly but are somewhat linked.

If you're looking for a social view, then it could contain a plethora of factors, religion being a key one within many western countries, if innately. That is not to say that it is an underlying socio-religious concept, but rather the discourse which has arisen and remains from the establishment and preceding years after tend to allude to this.

Western Society has had a very intricate relationship with Christianity in its many forms, and thats a fair reflection of the laws and discourses which we find ourselves in.

The virgin though wasnt a purely Christian concept, and has been widespread, probably firstly as a practical concept, transmitted into some form of ritual, and then becoming normalised within the socio-psyche.

 

[Atticus.]

are you talking to me?

im talking to alot of people

 

[Tulipa]

her name may be sarah?

and thanks asylum

The virgin though wasnt a purely Christian concept, and has been widespread, probably firstly as a practical concept, transmitted into some form of ritual, and then becoming normalised within the socio-psyche.

yes but why do we hold onto that view? why has it become normalised?

(i think i understood most of your post)

 

[jumb]

her name may be sarah?

and thanks asylum



yes but why do we hold onto that view? why has it become normalised?

(i think i understood most of your post)

Because sex is taboo.

 

[Atticus.]

some people are so dogmattic

 

[AsyLum]

yes but why do we hold onto that view? why has it become normalised?

(i think i understood most of your post)

Rather than "holding on" actively, the conditioning and normalising effect has come about through the institutions, the media representations, the very wording of sentences and dogmas, etc.

Why do we have male/females? Why is there such a thing as sexuality? Basically its something thats being perpetuated through the systems which had been originally set up.

People have done thesises (sp?) on this topic, so yeah

 

[soha]

in reguards to that
god also has reasons why we cnat have sex before marriage which are reason enough to follow his command

a slong a speople know why they are doing something..not just following it blindly

 

[minushuman]

I like the part where there's much less of a chance of getting STD's

...that's what I enjoy about being a virgin, but that's all.

 

[Alimoe_KG]

So if you do perform bad the first time, at least you have an excuse.

 

[MzbLaZeIT]

It's a personal choice... when you feel respected and loved sex is right I reckon... whether BEFORE OR AFTER marriage. It's not about purity etc... deciding the right time and perhaps waiting is really just about self respect. Go with your best interests at heart. NOW. TOMORROW. 2 years. JUST WHEN IT'S RIGHT. There's no doctrine when it comes to virginity... I don't even think the ''stay a virgin 'till your wedding night'' is right for everyone... There I said it.

here here!