Swizzle's Love Thread - Post anonymous messages to your secret crush (13 Viewers)

[RealiseNothing]

My crush, you have had the most incredible impact on my life, beauty and intellect and sophistication and elegance and sexiness where absolutely redefined when I met you. You just have it all, and are just amazing. I love you so much, please, will you love me back?

were*

 

[jackerino]

lol thanks realise haha.


MORE:

My heart aches every time I think of you, I long to see you and your perfect figure, just to talk to you, and be in your presence. I want to be with you more than anything. You are older than me but not by much at all, I think I would be a perfect guy for you. Please love me back!



Thanks. Thats all I wanted to say guys. Lol.

Hey btw im thinking I might end up doing engineering at UNSW, my friends recommended it, though I have some buds at UNSW medicine, now was just wondering if i'd be able to walk from engineering to medicine to say hi you know... are they close? or on different campuses?

 

[Shadowdude]

Dear current #4 and #5 secret crushes,

The invitation to be my study buddy (and/or more) is open to you too =)


Dear #5 secret crush only,

You're like... super talkative in class. Well, not really. But everything you say is pretty much right. You have this sort of... calm, collected and thoughtful method in presenting your analysis.

With your super duper analysis and thought skillz, and my epic marks and ability to write awesome things and essays that attain gr8 marks, WE COULD BE UNSTOPPABLE


Dear former #1 secret crush,

You doubted the amazing comeback. you silly girl

 

[Ahmed ftw]

being interested in a female is not showing respect?

what

not the way shadowdude is interested in em :/
were u purposely oblivious to the previous posts between shadowdude and myself? geez.

 

[pony_magician]

Dear current #1 secret crush,

You made your choice.

But, I know for a fact that I got a higher mark than your "boyfriend" (and I use that term loosely) in the assessment we got back today.

 

[Firstra1]

Dear secret crush,

Watch out for the Axe murderers, psychopaths and serial killers attracted to your beauty and want to dismember your body and cut up your face.

I should know, because I AM ONE OF THEM.

 

[pony_magician]

wow in the nearly 2400 posts in tis thread, NO ONE has made that joke

congratulations on being funny

 

[Shadowdude]

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lscm26JxvR1qhvz4go1_500.png[/IM][/QUOTE]

m8

---

Dear new #1 secret crush,

I really, really, really hope you don't have a boyfriend.


I thought it might've been awkward, me finding the courage inside to go up to you and start a conversation - because you and I had never actually spent time alone, chatting together.

But the quarter hour or so when we just starting chatting? I dunno, it's like... I didn't get that vibe that I had to watch what I say, or be very careful in what I did. It was pretty amazing, you and I just chatting without a care in the world; you and your very expressive facial expressions, and me with my elaborate hand gestures...

Sure, it didn't go perfect, but... considering me, and many other factors? Doesn't matter at all, it went better than I thought it would.

I also can't believe I (technically) asked you out.

And hopefully, I'll see you around.

 

[Firstra1]

With my secret crush,

On top of her in bed i listen to her moan and scream.........in Terror as i smother her face with a pillow. She struggles free and runs down the hallway yelling: "HELP! HELP! Theres someone in my house! Intruder!".

As she runs toward the front door I grab a knife from the kitchen and chase after her. To her horror she discovers i have locked the door from the inside, blocking her escape. She turns around and sees me standing there, staring at her knife in hand.
She screams uncontrollably as i slowly approach her. Suddenly she grabs a long umbrella next to the door ready to make her last heroic stand. Unable to reach her with the knife i grab a bottle of wine on the table and throw it at her head, knocking her to the floor. As she lays half conscious i run over to her and pull rope from my pocket to tie up her arms and legs, and wrap duct tape around her mouth.

I sprawl her naked body facedown on my kitchen bench and use a slicer to cut a deep rectangle all around her back, i then rip her skin off her back in one piece like pulling carpet from the floor, exposing her delicious, juicy tender red meat. I remove the meat off her back like strips of bacon and put them in lemon herb spices.

To remove her ribs i use a chopper to crack open her chest, then insert my fingers and pull apart in opposite directions seperating her ribs from her body. I put her ribs on a kitchen board and coat them with BBQ honey marinade to be charcoal grilled.

Using a sharp knife i cut slices of meat off her thighs, cutting at 45 degree angles the same way you cut a leg roast of ham. Her tender thigh steak ready for the BBQ.

I use poultry scissors to cut off her lips and cut out her tongue, then use a knife to carve out her cheeks and eyelids and put them onto a platter. I cut off her hair to use for decorations and aroma.

Saliva drips from my watering mouth.

 

[soloooooo]

Fistra1 writes better erotica than Shadowdude does.

 

[Riproot]

no that is not true at all

Yes, it is. You are in no way more womanly than me/you do not have more female friends than.

How would you know over me?

except that's the most harmless ones.

 

[Arcorn]

m8

---

Dear new #1 secret crush,

I really, really, really hope you don't have a boyfriend.


I thought it might've been awkward, me finding the courage inside to go up to you and start a conversation - because you and I had never actually spent time alone, chatting together.

But the quarter hour or so when we just starting chatting? I dunno, it's like... I didn't get that vibe that I had to watch what I say, or be very careful in what I did. It was pretty amazing, you and I just chatting without a care in the world; you and your very expressive facial expressions, and me with my elaborate hand gestures...

Sure, it didn't go perfect, but... considering me, and many other factors? Doesn't matter at all, it went better than I thought it would.

I also can't believe I (technically) asked you out.

And hopefully, I'll see you around.

...Crush #1? And you spoke to her for 15 minutes, she was being polite.

 

[Arcorn]

This. So so much.

 

[Lolsmith]

Yes, it is. You are in no way more womanly than me/you do not have more female friends than.

How would you know over me?

I'm not talking about what you or your moron friends think "respect" is

If I thought black was white, would that make it white?

 

[jackerino]

With my secret crush,

On top of her in bed i listen to her moan and scream.........in Terror as i smother her face with a pillow. She struggles free and runs down the hallway yelling: "HELP! HELP! Theres someone in my house! Intruder!".

As she runs toward the front door I grab a knife from the kitchen and chase after her. To her horror she discovers i have locked the door from the inside, blocking her escape. She turns around and sees me standing there, staring at her knife in hand.
She screams uncontrollably as i slowly approach her. Suddenly she grabs a long umbrella next to the door ready to make her last heroic stand. Unable to reach her with the knife i grab a bottle of wine on the table and throw it at her head, knocking her to the floor. As she lays half conscious i run over to her and pull rope from my pocket to tie up her arms and legs, and wrap duct tape around her mouth.

I sprawl her naked body facedown on my kitchen bench and use a slicer to cut a deep rectangle all around her back, i then rip her skin off her back in one piece like pulling carpet from the floor, exposing her delicious, juicy tender red meat. I remove the meat off her back like strips of bacon and put them in lemon herb spices.

To remove her ribs i use a chopper to crack open her chest, then insert my fingers and pull apart in opposite directions seperating her ribs from her body. I put her ribs on a kitchen board and coat them with BBQ honey marinade to be charcoal grilled.

Using a sharp knife i cut slices of meat off her thighs, cutting at 45 degree angles the same way you cut a leg roast of ham. Her tender thigh steak ready for the BBQ.

I use poultry scissors to cut off her lips and cut out her tongue, then use a knife to carve out her cheeks and eyelids and put them onto a platter. I cut off her hair to use for decorations and aroma.

Saliva drips from my watering mouth.

This is great! lol. So, disturbingly fascinating and interesting haha.

 

[Shadowdude]

...Crush #1? And you spoke to her for 15 minutes, she was being polite.

m8 she was smiling and being generally awesome ok

 

[townie]

Ugh

 

[Blue Suede]

m8 she was smiling and being generally awesome ok

I almost always smile and am generally awesome. Doesn't mean I want to bang every guy I meet.

 

[Rixon]

you obviously haven't met shadowdude

 

[Riproot]

I'm not talking about what you or your moron friends think "respect" is

If I thought black was white, would that make it white?

Wow. Please stop trying to be logical, it doesn't suit your skin tone one bit.

I almost always smile and am generally awesome. Doesn't mean I want to bang every guy I meet.

I'd say this too but I'd be lying.