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Best+Worst of Teacher Quotes and Habits (1 Viewer)

Tumnus

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LOL yeah, i mentioned that to the teacher and one of the girls in my class was like, "it scares me that you even thought of that" i was only joking though.

true. but still, it's a scary thought...
HAHAH at one of our lockdowns i asked who controlled the alarm bell, my maths teacher was like "the office ladies"
me: so i should shoot them first
Teacher: yes, just leave the rest of us alone (or smthing like that)
lol he's the bes teacher eva
 
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something in class going on abuot swine flu
then maths teacher starts talking
"...they said if there's ever a black president, pigs will fly,

swine flu, get it swine flew"

teachers are so damn lame
someone actually said that in bio the other day lol
 

x.christina

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My english teacher is fucking amazing hahahaha

2008 QUOTES:
"I was driving along, and I was shocked! Because there were all these fags lying on the ground!"
"Doesn't your mum use colour-safe bleach?"
"You can learn a lot from watching Seinfeld"
"Yo're a loser. Get out of my life"
"You're having a gaytime. I love gaytimes!"
"We're just leaving the room to go and talk about you behind your backs"
(About Prince Albert)"Well Queen Victoria thought he was very hot"
"He probably saw them and went OHHH *sexual shudder*"

2009 QUOTES:
"A dam burst out of my eyes"
Tobacco is organic- Suck it down and see what happens!"
"Marijuana will either kill you, or drive you psychotic"
*American accent* "I know where you can get some stuff man..."
"Look! She's not even wearing any make-up!"
"I'm a man of all breeds..."
"She's got this stick... to beat this... thing... senseless"
 

Omie Jay

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"[careers advisor talking about study habits when she was in high school], i called this technique Academic Masturbation, and i did it a lot during school"


...thereafter many lulz were had.
 

yer8899

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My english teacher is fucking amazing hahahaha

2008 QUOTES:
"I was driving along, and I was shocked! Because there were all these fags lying on the ground!"
"Doesn't your mum use colour-safe bleach?"
"You can learn a lot from watching Seinfeld"
"Yo're a loser. Get out of my life"
"You're having a gaytime. I love gaytimes!"
"We're just leaving the room to go and talk about you behind your backs"
(About Prince Albert)"Well Queen Victoria thought he was very hot"
"He probably saw them and went OHHH *sexual shudder*"

2009 QUOTES:
"A dam burst out of my eyes"
Tobacco is organic- Suck it down and see what happens!"
"Marijuana will either kill you, or drive you psychotic"
*American accent* "I know where you can get some stuff man..."
"Look! She's not even wearing any make-up!"
"I'm a man of all breeds..."
"She's got this stick... to beat this... thing... senseless"
i hope this was a joke post because that is some of the unfunniest shit ive ever heard
 

x.christina

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i hope this was a joke post because that is some of the unfunniest shit ive ever heard
well, its more like "you had to be there and you have to know him" kinda thing.
 

Jayy-StaRawr

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My favourite thing my history teacher has said to me =D

Girl In Class: god im hungry
Teacher: DONT BE SO FAT YOU ATE LAST NIGHT
 

electrolysis

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Use to have this maths teacher who would always sleep in class..
but he got sacked :D
 

roar84eighty

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Use to have this maths teacher who would always sleep in class..
but he got sacked :D
Hahaha! I remember that guy.
But he only done that when he got sleepy after playing sudoku and text the ladiez lol.
He was such a fail teacher.
 

chadmeleon

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Teacher of Music - lets call her Mrs P
1. Talks only in third person
2. Is insane

Sample of a Wednesday morning class in Yr9
Mrs P bursts in 10mins late "Mrs P does not feel like teaching today!'
exits room.

5-10mins later, walks confidently back in
Mrs P was joking."
 

alex.leon

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baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahaaaaa!

Lol i'm reading this in the library at school, and i just pissed myself laughing and everyone stared but it was so worth it!

the exact same thing happened to me!!
 

pman

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DP to yr 12 student: "You can only have your breasts back if you bring a note"
Science teacher: "be careful otherwise you will hit yourself with your eye"
English Teacher: "Don't bang the table or I'll bang you"
English teacher: "those of you who need to do drugs, go do them now, Alex, why are you still here"
 

electrolysis

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our economics teacher literally says 'lol' all the time... its weird
 

q3thefish

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Lolz, one of my teachers tries to start a dota conversation whenever we're concentrating on work or when there's an awkward silence.

e.g. *pencil writing sounds* "Soooo guys, who likes using enchant most?"
 
Last edited:

Fortify

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Lolz, one of my teachers tries to start a dota conversation whenever we're concentrating on work or when there's an awkward silence.

e.g. *pencil writing sounds* "Soooo guys, who likes using enchant most?"
Nice; I wish our teachers talked about games =(
 

q3thefish

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Lol. It's kinda annoying though. Imagine. You're fully focused and your studies yeh? And BAM! "Hey kids, I played sd pros only the other night and they told me to go to apem for noobs. What are noobs?"

So yeh..
 

Fortify

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Lol. It's kinda annoying though. Imagine. You're fully focused and your studies yeh? And BAM! "Hey kids, I played sd pros only the other night and they told me to go to apem for noobs. What are noobs?"

So yeh..
bahaahahahahaha !
 

AlphabetSoup

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This isn't a funny quote, but the other day my teacher came into class and everyone was rofl-ing as soon as they looked up; he looked so confused. We were laughing because he was wearing this gross brown shirt that had these really bright, white spots all over it. It looked like a freaking optical illusion! And not only that, but he had the same colour brown shoes! It was like a matching ensemble.

He always gets teased for his fashion sense (I go to an all girls school) and one time he came wearing a checked black and white shirt and people kept telling him he looked like he was wearing a table cloth.

Hahahaha.
 

Sprattboy

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Our Deputy Principal on Assembly a few months ago:

Deputy : Our school has allot different sporting talents, but one i found out about recently is *student* and his achievements in sailing. He recently came third in such and such events .....

This mean nothing to me .

The whole school cracked up laughing.

( he meant he didn't understand the different sailing categories )

..............................................................................................................

My physics teacher's holiday rules (which he wrote on the board at the end of last year) :

1. Don't play with explosives
2. Stay away from drugs and alcohol
3. Avoid loose women

There is one girl in the class .
 

susie22

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In science class talking about recessive/dominant traits.

Red haired girl student: Ah apparently red haired people are going extinct!

Old red haired male teacher: Yehh I heard that, guess it's up to us to repopulate the earth.

oh how i will miss teachers.
 

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