Dance Champ Teen Found Dead Before Exam (1 Viewer)

[ur_inner_child]

http://www.news.com.au/dailytelegraph/story/0,22049,20628142-5005941,00.html

Dance champ teen found dead before exam

ELIZABETH CLARO had dreams of becoming one of the stars of Lord of the Dance.

As the best Irish dancer in Australia, she had a better chance then most.

But the five-time Australian Gaelic dancing champion was found dead in her Sydney home by a relative the night before her first HSC exam.

The 18-year-old's friends at Our Lady of Mercy college, Parramatta have been rocked by the tragedy, with many confronted with the news of her shock death as they arrived to sit their first HSC exam last Friday.

Many received a distressing SMS text message, which was forwarded on to many students.

"It was such a shock," school friend Alibhinn Gallagher said.

"Everyone at school went crazy - wailing and crying. It was horrible. A lot of people were too upset to sit the exam. I did but I couldn't concentrate at all.

"There were people crying during the test.

"I got a phone call and couldn't believe it. I tried to call the house but couldn't get through. I can't believe she is gone."

Elizabeth's mother Anne said yesterday her daughter could have become a world-renowned dance star.

"She was an amazing, talented and gifted girl," she said.

"Everyone just loved her. Her life was short but spectacular. She was just out there.

"She came seventh in the world Irish dancing championships this year. She was just a natural dancer.

"We don't know what happened to her. We can't work out why. She had her life mapped out and was so happy."

Hundreds of tributes to Elizabeth have been posted on a dancing website. They have come from all over the world.

Elizabeth's friends were struggling to come to terms with her death just a week after celebrating her 18th birthday.

"It's so hard to comprehend it," Janelle Knowles said.

"It's just a tragedy. She was a great friend and we will all miss her. She lived life to the max but it was too short.

A spokeswoman for the NSW Board of Studies confirmed all students at the school who were traumatised by the death of their colleague would be given exam concessions.

"The Board of Studies is aware of the tragic sudden death of a Year 12 student last week and has been working closely with the school to give students every possible consideration during the examination period," the spokeswoman said.

""The board joins with the school in asking the media to respect the private grief of students, staff and their families at this time."

Elizabeth's funeral will be held at St Michaels church, Meadowbank at the end of the week.

The family are planning on burying Elizabeth in a bright green coffin adorned with orange flowers.

Police said the death was not being treated as suspicious.

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Because the non-school thread as well as the hijacked NCAP thread has been closed, I will outline the following:

I will allow the discussion of suicide in general, just make it clear that you're being general and not targeting Elizabeth soley so no one gets offended. People will always have their own pre-made ideas on suicide before this incident, so please, if you know Elizabeth, do not be too sensitive about other people's general opinion on suicide. I know it is hard to simply let them get away with it, but in this forum, it will be relevant. Please feel free to report any posts for re-evaluation.

Having said that, posts on suicide in general must be mature and constructive. No matter your stance on suicide, it is still quite tragic. Also, keep in mind that this is not the non-school forum. I suggest your read the NCAP guidelines before posting.

I will also allow "RIP Lily" posts and will not regard them as spam.

I don't mind if people express their own personal experiences on suicide (such as in the non-school thread) and how they dealt with it.

I will not allow links of Lily's myspace etc.

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For me personally, I'm quite shocked. I think mr_brightside said it best... what I instictively thought when I heard the news: I wish she had spoken to someone.

 

[blue_chameleon]

What an affliction to hear yet another HSC student fall to the apparent pressures and expectations of exams.
As has been stated in other threads, depression can ravage anyone and has no exclusions. The real tragedy is that people can fall to the depths of where they consider taking their life "the easier option".

We all need to be more open about issues that trouble us, no matter what the circumstances, for the diseases which are suicide and depression to be met head on.

 

[iamsickofyear12]

I have no sympathy for people who kill themselves because of the HSC. Absolutely none at all.

 

[ur_inner_child]

I have no sympathy for people who kill themselves because of the HSC. Absolutely none at all.

Yes but you don't know whether that's the reason

 

[iamsickofyear12]

It's the most likely and even if it isn't I'm sure it still wasn't a good enough reason for me to have any sympathy.

 

[blue_chameleon]

It's the most likely and even if it isn't I'm sure it still wasn't a good enough reason for me to have any sympathy.

Im wondering what situations and circumstances you would sympathise with? That is of course, without knowing any more to the cases than what the media releases. I am glad however, that you are not under similar pressures and expectations that those whom I have known take this unfortunate path surround themselves with.

 

[runtlocks]

It's the most likely and even if it isn't I'm sure it still wasn't a good enough reason for me to have any sympathy.

You're a buffoon

 

[Serius]

suicide light and offbeat? meh your choice but personally i think its a big issue
As someone pointed out to me we cant assume the girl killed herself because of the HSC, but if you are going to kill yourself, picking the morning of your friends HSC exam is a pretty shitty thing to do.

Suicide in general i feel is a selfish solution, do these people think about their family and friends? I am in distant contact with a few people who have lost someone to suicide and they still feel the loss every day.
Then i think like, how much control do people have when they are depressed anyways? I have suffered some bouts of depression before and someone said how churchhill would not put himself in tempting situations when he had depression so it makes me wonder, was this completely implulsive? was there a plan? a hastily scribbled note? anything?

That article is shit because it doesnt even say suicide or give me the details i would like to know, it makes it sound like a complete mystery how she died[skirting the issues of suicide in the media no doubt] and that the police arent treating it suspicous...erm hello? why didnt any of her so called friends suspect anything? do anything? did she even talk to her friends and family or was she a complete loner? [unlikely, people have been saying how she had heaps of friends] was her whole life a facade?

Even if we assume that depressed people have no control over their thoughts, we know they have control over their actions... the last time i was depressed i had trouble looking to the future, but i knew it existed, you just have to ride through it and hope things work out for the best.

So suicide is a tragedy, but i would like to think its very preventable...no matter who you are, you will value life but i dont think suicide is something we can just put down as choice like "its my life i do what i want with it" because if you are thinking thoughts of suicide i reckon you arent in your right mind in the first place, your judgement is clouded and you are having difficulty looking to the future, i am sure 20 years from that moment you will look back and be damned thankful you didnt do it.

Look i dunno, maybe iam just projecting how i would feel in the same situation, which would be a shitload of sorrow and more guilt than i could stand...

Because of the way i rationalise suicide you cant always blame the person for doing it, because like their thoughts arent under their own control...so whose responsability is it to make sure they are ok? friends and family...even if the person is trying to hide it its still your responsability. No one is blaming anyone because alot of the time the signs of depression and suicidal thoughts go completely under the radar but if you dont look out for your mates who will?

 

[jb_nc]

Doesn't anyone else consider the first sentence of that article rather stupid when she killed herself?

It's not as though she was tragically murdered. She was the one who ended her own life.

 

[CSI: CRIMES ™]

When i had my hsc exam i know some people started to scream uncontrolably in the exam room, i think she went nutts crying ' i cant do this, i cant do this' crazy that the hsc exams put through this much pressure, i was in alot of pressure but being relaxed and doing outdoor activities kept me occupied from being worried soo much, i know one of my friends who did it she locked herself in her room 1 week straight before the exams so that no one could disturb her studying

 

[_dhj_]

Obviously this is tragic for her family and friends.

But those who die young will always leave behind an enigmatic aura.

May she rest in peace and in eternal youth.

 

[_dhj_]

So suicide is a tragedy, but i would like to think its very preventable...no matter who you are, you will value life but i dont think suicide is something we can just put down as choice like "its my life i do what i want with it" because if you are thinking thoughts of suicide i reckon you arent in your right mind in the first place, your judgement is clouded and you are having difficulty looking to the future, i am sure 20 years from that moment you will look back and be damned thankful you didnt do it.

To be honest I have not lost any friends to suicide, but as I understand those who commit suicide tend to be the most philosophical about life. In my opinion that is the most tragic thing about suicide. Ordinary people tend not to be susceptable to suicide as they are too stupid to even consider the meaning or direction of their life. They live a mundane and mediocre existence. Those who commit suicide tend to be thinkers, intellectuals - and in that sense tend to have the greatest potential to contribute to society, and their lives were actually most worth living.

 

[anialicious]

To be honest I have not lost any friends to suicide, but as I understand those who commit suicide tend to be the most philosophical about life. In my opinion that is the most tragic thing about suicide. Ordinary people tend not to be susceptable to suicide as they are too stupid to even consider the meaning or direction of their life. They live a mundane and mediocre existence. Those who commit suicide tend to be thinkers, intellectuals - and in that sense tend to have the greatest potential to contribute to society, and their lives were actually most worth living.

i completely agree with dhj.

i also think that those who believe suicide is selfish are the ones who are the most ignorant - their stance on suicide seems to change according to the degree to which they can understand a certain situation, although they still put forward their views stating them as if they were the 'universally accepted opinion' on suicide.
however, i think their ignorance manifests itself in their inability to distinguish what they believe to be their own views from that of whats been fed to them through society.

take juliet, shakespeares classic character for example - her death has not drawn as much criticism even though she clearly took her own life, perhaps because it has already been predisposed and accepted as being the tragedy of love?
likewise the controvertial suicide of kurt cobain has not been labelled as selfish - but seen as the death of a legend who was ultimately consumed by drugs, the media and a bitter relationship. yet he remains a legacy and still possesses loyal followers to this day.

why is it that the suicide of a high school girl has been branded as 'selfish' by people of her own age who do not even have the adequate life experience to completely understand her situation? yet other suicide's throughout history can be accepted?

i think it is because the youth of today, although believing they are independant thinkers, have opinions that are really only the product of society. they have been fed that beautiful, attractive, popular young students who commit suicide are selfish. on the other hand they are also led to accept certain 'exceptions' as in the case of juliet and kurt. they are threatened by the thought that someone our own age would be willing to take their own life - and seek to rerify this by labelling them while in the process justifying that their moral's, decisions and opinions are more 'enlightened' than that girl's would ever be.

dont take me wrong, i am NOT endorsing suicide and yes i believe there are many other options. but the point is we were given free for a reason. lets stop being sheep and labelling her - it was her life and her choice to make, not ours.

 

[Serius]

to the contrary it wasnt her choice... when i was in hospital delerious from a brain lining infection i kept trying to pull out tubing and a drip from my body... its my choice to make right? even though iam not in my right mind? even though its for my own good and i dont know what the hell is going on?

wrong. If someone is suicidal they are NOT thinking rationally. Wouldnt you prefer she was still alive?
oh HAY, LAWL its lyke her choize? and even then who said with rational things its your choice... you owe a debt to society for raising you and you owe a debt to your parents.

Its selfish in that you arent considering the feelings of others, just doing what you think well help you in the short term [i.e killing yourself to end the pain or the stress or whatever] when there are better options out there... anyone who is suicidal should consider anti-depressants, they should keep you happy and alive long enough to sort out your psychological issues.

 

[iambored]

It's the most likely and even if it isn't I'm sure it still wasn't a good enough reason for me to have any sympathy.

Actually, imo it would add to the pressure but it's not the most likely reason.

to the contrary it wasnt her choice... when i was in hospital delerious from a brain lining infection i kept trying to pull out tubing and a drip from my body... its my choice to make right? even though iam not in my right mind? even though its for my own good and i dont know what the hell is going on?

wrong. If someone is suicidal they are NOT thinking rationally. Wouldnt you prefer she was still alive?
oh HAY, LAWL its lyke her choize? and even then who said with rational things its your choice... you owe a debt to society for raising you and you owe a debt to your parents.

Its selfish in that you arent considering the feelings of others, just doing what you think well help you in the short term [i.e killing yourself to end the pain or the stress or whatever] when there are better options out there... anyone who is suicidal should consider anti-depressants, they should keep you happy and alive long enough to sort out your psychological issues.

From reading your other posts I assume you're saying that by committing suicide the person is being selfish, rather than that it's a self-centred type of 'solution' to a problem.

If that is the case - you seem to contradict yourself. You say that they are not in their right mind, but then say that it's selfish because they aren't considering the feelings of others - if you're not in your right mind, maybe you can't consider the feelings of others, maybe you don't realise that you have psychological issues, maybe you can't see past the short term and can't understand that there are better options. If you're physically incapable of something, that's not being selfish.

 

[phatic]

Damn, another suicide. Always a tragedy. Maybe the Board of Studies could look at making the HSC less stressful for young people...

To be honest I have not lost any friends to suicide, but as I understand those who commit suicide tend to be the most philosophical about life. In my opinion that is the most tragic thing about suicide. Ordinary people tend not to be susceptable to suicide as they are too stupid to even consider the meaning or direction of their life. They live a mundane and mediocre existence. Those who commit suicide tend to be thinkers, intellectuals - and in that sense tend to have the greatest potential to contribute to society, and their lives were actually most worth living.

Fully agreed. I've read about too many artists and the like being so close to suicide, i.e. Beethoven, Berlioz, some of the German Expressionist painters, etc. Also Schumann committed suicide in mid-life.

As I said in the other thread, it is quite easy to be in your right mind, thinking rationally, and commit suicide. If life is unbearably painful/stressful, and you can see no way out of it, death would seem like the only relief.

As for suicide being 'selfish', I don't think this is fair. It's kind of hard to consider the feelings of others when one is suffering so deeply within. We are all sensitive to emotions, particularly in adolescence, and shouldn't be expected to just rationalise the pain away and get on with living. The lack of understanding from others, who can't see the darker side of life, only isolates those who are suffering, and makes it worse.

Also I think it is quite easy to adopt a facade, living in a 'dream world' sometimes, telling no-one how you really feel. You can even convince yourself that things aren't so bad. It may work for a while, but eventually the tension becomes overwhelming, and leads to such actions as suicide, nervous breakdown, etc.

On the other side, those who survive such difficult times often lead the fullest lives. Imagine how many people deeply appreciate the music of Beethoven, and yet we could easily have had so much less of it.

But no-one has any debts or obligations to society, to have to perform to their fullest all the time, etc. People adding to the pressure like this only makes things worse. If I wanted to live on a tropical island, eating coconuts all day and dreaming, I can do so. People can do whatever they want with their lives (within reason).

 

[Serius]

Whenever i get really depressed, the one thing that really pisses me off is those overly happy people who look like they are on something all the time... like how can someone find life THAT good ALL the time? even when iam happy iam not that self deluded that i cant see the dark side of life.

 

[FireFlower]

I think its sad that theres such stigma surrounding suicide and depression, and that its so misunderstood.

I respect that everyone has a right to their own opinion on the subject, but I think that people who say that suicide is selfish or weak are actually contributing to the problem. Those kind of statements just make suicidal people feel even more isolated and misunderstood, which can prevent them from seeking help.

I have to disagree with you, politik, when you say that the story should not have been reported. I think that suicide shouldn't just be swept under the rug, but that it should be discussed openly. I personly think its actually better to accept that suicides happen, and try to find ways to reduce it, rather than just pretend that its not happening.

 

[iambored]

While this case is a girl, the suicide rate remains rediculously high for males (16-24) for the reason of not telling anyone how you feel - due to the "male pride" syndrome.

actually, i think i was told that there are more attempts for females, more males succeed because they use more aggressive methods (and so are more likely to succeed)

 

[blue_chameleon]

Whenever i get really depressed, the one thing that really pisses me off is those overly happy people who look like they are on something all the time... like how can someone find life THAT good ALL the time? even when iam happy iam not that self deluded that i cant see the dark side of life.

Ever heard "fall down 5 times, get up 6"? Different outlooks on life.

People that dont focus on the bad moments and disappointments in their life arent self-deluded, they are just fortunate enough to be able to not worry about the pressures of life that many others may not be able to handle as successfully.

In saying that, what you see displayed from one person, might be a lot different when you dont see them. You cant be sure that they are like that constantly.