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Rules for Customers (2 Viewers)

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to the stupid customers i had at the end of today:

when i drag all the stuff outside in, tell you we're closing and start closing the door, while my co-worker is counting the till, it means GTFO, not 'continue to browse as you were'.

at 4 i told everyone in the store we were closed. 15 minutes later we got out of there, because a few people decided they would SIT DOWN and continue reading. seriously wtf.
 

spazamataz

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EDIT:
-YES I know how Everyday Rewards Cards WORK!! This store was one of the several PILOT stores who had Everyday Rewards Cards first. So, TAKE YOUR SYDNEY ARSE back to where you came from. Don't tell me that I am stupid, you are the one who clearly doesn't understand how these work. You get the fuel docket if you spend OVER $30. I don't give a FUCK what they say in sydney, read the print, I know. I helped launch the shit
AHhh... I hate Sydney people who are like "Well we do it like this in sydney!!!" And when i tell people we don't take everyday rewards, because we indeed are not a woolworths, nor a coles!
 
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My pet peeves:

-Yes, you do have to purchase your smokes on a separate register, and no, you can't just transfer it. It is against the law. Have a problem? Take it up with the government.
-No. I don't give a fuck about how you want your groceries pack. I do a pretty god damn job, and no-one else has had a problem until you. I have worked here for almost 4 years, I know how much a plastic bag can handle, I know colds go with colds and I know that cleaning products go by themselves. Also, No, I will NOT double bag everything. Go be a eco-terrorist somewhere else.
-Yes. This is the ONLY colour of plastic bag we have. No, I don't care if the yellow ones are better. This is what you are getting.
-Green Bags are not to be treated like plastic bags. Plastic bags are meant to be scrunched up, green bags are meant to be folded nicely, which brings me to my next point...
-When there are cockroaches in your green bag, it is time to renew them, and most likely clean your home.
-It is not mine, nor the companies fault, that you are too dumb to properly read the tickets on the shelf. Yes, that is the price, and if you want it, you WILL have to pay that price.
-I don't care if you don't like it, there is a perfectly good supermarket across the road. Also, notice the absence of customers - there is a reason that no-one shops there... Ask about their health inspector infringements and fines.
-Yes, that special has ended. And no, you cannot get one for that price.
-No, I will not change your money for coins for the chocolate machine/toy machine, I do need that roll of $2 coins for giving change
-I don't care if that coke machine swallowed your money. Ring the help number. No, you cannot use our phone.
-No, you cannot get $500 cash out, use an ATM. There are 3 in a 20m radius of you (not joking - there are 3 in 20m)
-When I am walking around on my phone, or have a handful of food from Bakers Delight or some other take away store, I am on a BREAK and I DO NOT want to help you take your shit out to the car. And I dont care that you are in a hurry - Im on a break and I will get someone else for you. Yes, you will have to wait.
-When it is busy, don't slame your hands on the smokeshop counter and demand to be served. I noticed you were there, and I also noticed your position in correspondence to the express line. I will serve you after I serve the people who got here before you. Every time you slam your hands, you go back further in that line.

EDIT:
-YES I know how Everyday Rewards Cards WORK!! This store was one of the several PILOT stores who had Everyday Rewards Cards first. So, TAKE YOUR SYDNEY ARSE back to where you came from. Don't tell me that I am stupid, you are the one who clearly doesn't understand how these work. You get the fuel docket if you spend OVER $30. I don't give a FUCK what they say in sydney, read the print, I know. I helped launch the shit
Agree with everything you said, particularly the bold.

Also
  • I wish my store didn't do saved transactions. People have had over three years here to get used to the new rules. Its time that they took enough cash out to cover their asses. We don't save for liquor, why should we save for cigarettes.
  • I get the shit about particular bags as well. Apparantly pink is the best, and dark grey the worst.
  • My SSM once told someone to ring Coke from our Service Desk phone. She was on hold for 20 minutes. I was so fucking pissed off at him.
  • Also wish my store did that with smokeshop. Apaz we need to serve smokeshop before the express line. Fucking stupid if you ask me.
  • EDR cards are one of the worst things about working at Woolworths.
 

iMatthew

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I was in Kmart the other week with my full Woolworths uniform on and this customer comes up out of nowhere, all high and mighty and goes "Excuse me! Where's the baby section?".
I slowishly turned around and said, "Sorry, I do not work here" and walked away.

Who could POSSIBLY be so dumb as to not look at who they are asking? If they spent half a second to look at some other Kmart staff, they'd notice they do not have green uniforms.
*facepalm*


Oh, and lol... Coles gift cards will not work. Life sucks hey? lol.
 
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I was in Kmart the other week with my full Woolworths uniform on and this customer comes up out of nowhere, all high and mighty and goes "Excuse me! Where's the baby section?".
I slowishly turned around and said, "Sorry, I do not work here" and walked away.

Who could POSSIBLY be so dumb as to not look at who they are asking? If they spent half a second to look at some other Kmart staff, they'd notice they do not have green uniforms.
*facepalm*
Haha, I was once in Kmart in full woolies uniform, and someone asked me where something was. I knew where it was, I told them, and that freaked the person out even more.
fucking classic.
 

iMatthew

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Haha, I was once in Kmart in full woolies uniform, and someone asked me where something was. I knew where it was, I told them, and that freaked the person out even more.
fucking classic.
What annoys me on this subject is, they do not even ATTEMPT to look for themselves. 70% of the time, I give them a guess based on the aisle descriptions above each aisle, no reason why they can't do exactly the same.
 

meilz92

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dont you dare have a go at me for leaving the counter unattended when i had to go help another customer with a product. i dont care if you were waiting for 2 seconds or 5 minutes, somebody else should have come to serve you since i was busy with another customer.

if a product is marked as $7.45 and you buy a couple of them, but they scan as $7.47, do not have a go at me for the 5c discrepency in the rounding difference. i am not the one who labels these products. furthermore, do not demand a 5c refund once i have already rung off your sale!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 

Otacon2009

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Agree with everything you said, particularly the bold.

  • EDR cards are one of the worst things about working at Woolworths.
Oh hear hear about that. I miss Woolies 2007 where you could conduct a transaction without having to repeat the question so many times (and piss off a customer, possibly leading to a complaint), skip one customer, piss them off because they have to keep the docket and now I can piss them off over that crappy Frequent Flyers program because unlike the self serves, I get tired of repeating myself. I can also piss off management because my scan rate is too low.

This is not to mention the entire concept of loyalty programs. I'm sick of explaining the horribly simple concept to customers that after $30, you have an electronic version of your fuel docket and if on the off chance you have a FF card, then every $$$ you spend over 30 is one point. Also, when I did marketing and communications last year, I learned that loyalty programs are cheap ploys to get personal information with an incentive such as e-dockets and FF points to get you to sign up. I'm not saying "OMG! WEAR TIN FOIL HATS AS TEH GOVERNMENT IS USING SATELYTES TO TRACK OUR MOVEMENTS!" and I knew there was reason behind it, but I'm just not keen on having a mountain of spam piling in my inbox or have Wasim Amadruta from India trying to sell me stuff I can't even verify is true.
 

iMatthew

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I know right? They get annoyed as to how many times they have to answer 'no'.

EDR Card? no..
Cash Out? No....

I feel like I am a dodgy salesperson when I ask for EDR cards heh
 
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Oh hear hear about that. I miss Woolies 2007 where you could conduct a transaction without having to repeat the question so many times (and piss off a customer, possibly leading to a complaint), skip one customer, piss them off because they have to keep the docket and now I can piss them off over that crappy Frequent Flyers program because unlike the self serves, I get tired of repeating myself. I can also piss off management because my scan rate is too low.

This is not to mention the entire concept of loyalty programs. I'm sick of explaining the horribly simple concept to customers that after $30, you have an electronic version of your fuel docket and if on the off chance you have a FF card, then every $$$ you spend over 30 is one point. Also, when I did marketing and communications last year, I learned that loyalty programs are cheap ploys to get personal information with an incentive such as e-dockets and FF points to get you to sign up. I'm not saying "OMG! WEAR TIN FOIL HATS AS TEH GOVERNMENT IS USING SATELYTES TO TRACK OUR MOVEMENTS!" and I knew there was reason behind it, but I'm just not keen on having a mountain of spam piling in my inbox or have Wasim Amadruta from India trying to sell me stuff I can't even verify is true.
The majority of customers don't even have registered EDR cards. When that function first came up on screen, I was telling people that their cards weren't registered. But since I'm not willing to register cards instore, I'm not telling people anymore.

Also I'm glad that we don't have a function to load the points after the transaction if they haven't used their EDR card (as Coles does with flybuys). That would be worse.

I know right? They get annoyed as to how many times they have to answer 'no'.

EDR Card? no..
Cash Out? No....

I feel like I am a dodgy salesperson when I ask for EDR cards heh
Especially when you know that the customer is getting nothing from it.
 
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I was in Kmart the other week with my full Woolworths uniform on and this customer comes up out of nowhere, all high and mighty and goes "Excuse me! Where's the baby section?".
I slowishly turned around and said, "Sorry, I do not work here" and walked away.

Who could POSSIBLY be so dumb as to not look at who they are asking? If they spent half a second to look at some other Kmart staff, they'd notice they do not have green uniforms.
*facepalm*


Oh, and lol... Coles gift cards will not work. Life sucks hey? lol.
This always happens to me in Big W. :/
 

bdude

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This always happens to me in Big W. :/
I get it all the time when I go into K-Mart after work. K-Mart's and Coles' uniforms are exactly the same except for different logos and the k-mart's next door so quite often I'll be in K-mart and someone will ask me for something. I imagine the K-Mart staff who come in get the same.

And I'll second the complaint about trying to go on break – I get 15 minutes and I'm going to make the most of it, that's why usually I already have what I want to eat in the staff room and make a bee line (?) to the staff room!
 

bdude

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huh!! I only have 10 and I have to shop lol
That's why I usually get to work a few minutes early and grab something if I need to.

I love how tea breaks at my store have gradually gone from being 10 minutes on the dot, to 15-20 minutes.
Well, I know that usually, depending which supervisor is on I can stretch my 15 minute out to 20 minutes especially if it's a quiet night. Then there are some supervisors which expect you to be back at your register by the 15 minutes (which is technically correct according to the award.)
 

townie

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see, i dont like that at woolworths either, the 15 minutes stretching, the fact is tea breaks are only 10 minutes plus REASONABLE WALKING TIME (to the break room), so infact the 5 minutes in itself is a stretch.
 

wixxy2348

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Dear Mr Old Man,
Do not touch my shoulder. Do NOT accidentally brush my breast region. Do not tell me I am beautiful. And do not tell me that your mind is probably playing tricks on you and making you THINK I am beautiful because of the amount of beer that you have consumed. Hmph. Do not cap this performance off by placing your hand on my shoulder again in a seedy way.
Sincerely,
Me.

EDIT: Seriously happened to me today. :|
 
Last edited:

DM Mike

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I was in Kmart the other week with my full Woolworths uniform on and this customer comes up out of nowhere, all high and mighty and goes "Excuse me! Where's the baby section?".
I slowishly turned around and said, "Sorry, I do not work here" and walked away.
I got to admit, I used to have some fun with this, my old store was busy, and especially back before the whole express alert thing there used to be queues, given I pass 2 quiet stores on the way home I used to go in there to do any shopping, even answering a question with a "I dont work here" confused enough customers but you could really mess with them if you didnt actually cop to the fact it wasnt your store. "I cant help you, id suggest finding a staff member" etc etc. I know it sounds prickish but this was back in my days as an assistant, and its not like I went into the store deliberately to have fun with the customers...
 

bdude

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see, i dont like that at woolworths either, the 15 minutes stretching, the fact is tea breaks are only 10 minutes plus REASONABLE WALKING TIME (to the break room), so infact the 5 minutes in itself is a stretch.
See our 15 minutes includes the walking time.
 

Omnidragon

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Rule #1: Do not ask me where things are. If you can't find it don't f**king buy it. See if I care

Rule #2: Do not ask me how to use it. If I knew I wouldn't be f**king working here. I'd actually have a real job and get paid at least 100k a year

Rule #3: Do not tell me you're in a rush. I'm in a rush too but still have to work. So stfu and don't talk to me when you're at the register

Rule #4: Customers, just please stop coming. I hate serving them, oh but please do pay me my $12. Need it to save up for that schoolies trip where I get busted by cops and cause public nuisance :jump:

Kids these days...
 

iMatthew

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See our 15 minutes includes the walking time.
Yeah you can kinda get away with it. It must vary store to store. My store has the "15 minutes from when you leave your register" kind of rule.

At night you could take a 30 min break on a 15 and nobody would:
a) care
b) notice

Mind you, we are a DEAD quiet store at night. Supervisor took an hour on her 45 last night (mind you I was all alone on front end lol).
 

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