~Don't get angry at me when you demand a few hundred dollars cash out and I tell you our limit is $100.  We are a food store, not a bank.  The owner makes the rules, I just work there.
 
~Don't turn up at five minutes to closing time and grab a trolley, then spend forever deciding what to buy.
 
~If you swipe your eftpos card with the magnetic strip upwards (ie, not in the machine at all) don't blame me when it doesn't work.
 
~If there is a long queue and I apologise for the wait and say "sorry, we have three girls off sick today so we are very short-staffed" don't tell me that we need to open more registers.  We are doing our best with what we have, dumbass.
 
~Don't unload your groceries on the counter on top of/mixed in with the previous customer's stuff.  I am not psychic, neither am I able to remember exactly what was theirs and what was yours.  Learn some patience and wait your turn.
~Don't rock up first thing on a monday morning and make a very small purchase and attempt to pay with a $100 note.  I will not have the change.  Also, don't abuse me when I don't have the change - how much of a float do you think the owner gives us?